(Don't) Send In The Clowns

Today I read a particularly amusing article that stated something that made me feel a little less unusual. The article states that children uniformly dislike clowns, and that even older children are sometimes afraid of them and cannot explain them. When I was a child I was seriously afraid of clowns, and even now I don't like them. What is it about clowns that are so universally disliked by children, and what is it about clowns that make adults think children like them? I don't know the answers, but I can give at least a little bit of perspective.

Why Children Don't Like Clowns?

It is possible that a large part of what makes children not like clowns, at all, is the fact that clowns are fake. Children, in all the experience I have ever had (either being a child or being around them) are pretty genuine. The only children that tend to be private or practice pretense usually have something seriously wrong going on in their lives, and have learned that hypocrisy usually from parents. Otherwise, children are very open and honest about what they want and what they don't like, even when they say they are being sneaky (I find this particularly amusing). However, clowns are not genuine. They have paint covering their faces, masking their identities (not likely to lead children to trust them). Furthermore, they have smiles painted on their faces, and children are pretty good at telling a fake from a genuine article. Somehow most of us lose the ability to do that as we get older, probably because it's so distressing to be in a world surrounded by fakes (especially when most people fake to be accepted by the other fakes), that to search for the genuine article is a fruitless and thankless task. Children, not being burdened by this, tend to see (rightfully) the clowns as fakers, and as untrustworthy fakers at that.

Why Do Adults Think Clowns Are Okay For Kids?

This is perhaps the more inexplicable question. Clowns, like a lot of other entertainment, were originally for adults. The clothing for clowns resembles that of the "fool" in royal courts. Ironically enough, the fool was dressed foolishly, but was given the (rare) privilege to tell kids the truth. Nowadays clowns dress foolishly and tell a bunch of pablum to an often unwilling audience of young folk. It is probably the flamboyance of clowns that makes adults think they would be suitable for kids. After all, clowns typically dress in bright colors and act silly. So do children--but children do it honestly, out of a (usually) innocent heart. Clowns are pretenders. Perhaps adults are insufficiently aware of the need to teach genuineness to their children, and so conspire to foist all of these lies upon children that make them bitter and cynical towards adults (see "The Tooth Fairy," "Santa Claus" and any number of other such lies). Perhaps parents would better serve their children by simply letting children be children, play innocent games (while keeping an eye on them to make sure they stay safe), and tell them the truth, and provide for them entertainments that are similarly honest (this may be a difficult task). That would be a better choice than to foist a bunch of creepy adults in makeup and bad clothing on children. Don't send in the clowns. Seriously, don't.