Justice Delayed Is Justice Denied

Yesterday, former Chilean dictator and tyrant General Augustin Pinochet died of a heart attack. The reaction to his death was a mixed one in what remains a somewhat divided nation some thirty-three years after he took power in a US-supported coup against an ineffective and highly socialist leader (President Allende, whose neice Isabelle writes some terrible dreck for novels, including one this writer had to read during high school). He then instituted a reign of terror against leftists (particularly young ones) who disappeared, and were presumably tortured and slain. Even after he gave up power to give Chile a fragile (but so far well-functioning) democracy, he still had immunity from facing justice in this life for his serious crimes against humanity. Despite some attempts by Spain and England earlier to bring him to justice, he remained unconvincted despite his serious wrongs.

So now he is dead, and can no longer face justice in this world. The result of his death was a mixture of cheering and mourning, of riots against Chile's recent attempts to try the aged Pinochet for his crimes, cheering people who claim (in a news article I read on it) to love Pinochet like they love their own children, and mourning people who feel as if the opportunity for justice has been taken from them. We live in an unjust world (and some of us have a more intimate and personal understanding of this than others, and some of us understand the injustice in different ways because of our own different personal experience). This world has always been unjust, and as long as humans govern I do not have hope that it will ever be entirely just, though I would hope for it to be a good deal more just than it is now. The world was probably more unjust in the past than it is now, but there is greater dissatisfaction at justice now than before, and injustices people used to get away with without comment now bring harsh condemnation (from people like myself, often).

There are two ways of viewing this growing dissatisfaction with the injustice of this world. One view, largely a holdover from wicked days in which leaders ruled harshly without accountability for their often wicked actions, considers leaders to be some kind of divinely ordained power figures who are only answerable to God and not to mere mortals (especially cranky and somewhat mistrusting mortals like myself). Simply because leaders behaved this way through much of the course of human history (and because of the undeniable appeal of leading when one does not have to answer to the hoi polloi, that is, the common folk) this still appeals in politically backwards and ungodly leadership models.

The other way of viewing this problem is the one I hold. In the two millenia since Jesus Christ came to this earth certain evils which were tolerated in times of old have become less tenable. Slavery, which was a "necessary" evil in the times of Paul (see Philemon) gradually became morally untenable as the commands to love slaves as brethren increasingly meant (as it was intended to originally) that one should not have slaves at all. The same is true with polygamy as being against the biblical mutual respect of men and women and the understanding that a man and a woman become one in marriage and thus it is sinful to cleave to more than one person. In the same way, the evils of "gentile" government that were tolerated have become increasingly morally untenable as they go against the true biblical understanding that as we are all God's children, created in the image of God, we should all be respected as such. Those who claim to rule with God's authority must meet the same moral standards God does, and if they do not they must be accountable to God's fellow children for their failings because leaders have no moral nature higher than those they rule (and often a good deal lower of a nature). We are all equals in the eye of God, who is no respector of persons. We should not be respectors of persons (or titles) either.

Unfortunately, this world seems not to have been created with an eye towards making sure justice happened in this life. A just world would need to be ruled by a perfect, all-knowing, and all-powerful being or set of beings, and only God meets that qualification. Therefore, those of us who long for a just world long for God's kingdom, even if we try to help this earth more closely resemble the perfect world above. Whether we admit this or not is one thing, but our world's demands for justice mean that we demand (whether consciously or not) for God to come to this earth and set up His kingdom, because none of us are capable of the perfect moral demands. It is for this reason that no just human government is unaccountable, because imperfect beings must be held accountable for their actions in order to avoid the creation of abusive systems of government (something of particular distaste for me).

Since this world is unjust, though, and since a perfectly just universe would not be particularly kind for any of us (because all of us fall woefully short of the perfect standard and are deserving of death for our sins), there must be some place for mercy and grace in our behavior as well. We must not abuse these to excuse the sins of others (who often twist grace and mercy to give themselves license to take advantage of others while demanding forgiveness for their own actions). However, mercy and grace are necessary because if we cannot forgive others and cast our burdens upon Jesus Christ then we ourselves carry a burden of bitterness and anger that no one can or should bear. And about that I have all too much experience myself. Since this world is unjust, though, sometimes we must wait for justice in the time to come, when no one will be able to escape censure for their deeds, naked in the harsh light of day to face accountability for their deeds. I think, though, that such a time would not be a time for gloating, but at least it will be fair. And that is enough.

A Bittersweet Success

This week I officially got my own office instead of having to share the copy room with a particularly ornery machine that has a tendency to jam easily, grab too many papers to scan or copy at once, and generally behave in a surly manner. While my papers at work are still in the state of some chaos (then again, aren't they always?), I know have some space to myself, even if I don't particularly like the layout yet. For example, I don't like the fact that the entrance to the office is behind me, as I tend to panic when people surprise me from behind. But I digress. Despite my pleasure about having an office of my own, what makes it a bittersweet success is the rather sad circumstances that opened up an office for me in the first place.

The former occupant of this office was named Manuel. He was in his mid-to-late 50's, overweight, with high blood pressure, high cholesteral, sleep apnia, and so forth (all of these problems being similar to those of my father before he had his stroke last December and died of a heart attack in February). He slept little (more at work than anywhere else), and worked two jobs--reviewing building plans as well as delivering newspapers. Then, while I was out of the country last month, he had a brain aneurysm. He is still in the hospital, though he may be released soon, as he has somewhat recovered (though his brain function is still highly limited and he is not going to be able to return for a long time, if ever, to work, a disastrous consequence for his family).

I can think of a few reasons why my coworker's health would be of such a concern to me, besides the fact that in general I don't like to see people suffer. What is the most troublesome is that his health seems to have been affected in a similar way to my father's health. Right now Manuel is at the slow recovery from a severe health crisis stage. Hopefully it goes well for him. Still, this has not been a good year for the health of people I know (I could go on and on with examples from friends, family, and coworkers, but I would rather not). Suffice it to say, though, that reminders of mortality are not ever very far from me, at least right now.

A Lesson In Irony

In my recent trip to the nation of Turkey, I saw two related cases of irony. The trip, however, was not merely ironic for me, but even more so for a friend of mine there as well, who was of Armenian ancestry. Why that would be ironic should be made clear in what follows.

Irony #1: Nathan correctly (and unintentionally) predicts the 2006 Nobel Prize Winner for Literature

Before I went to Turkey I wanted to do some research (because I am a compulsive reader and like to know information about the places I am about to see). Besides the usual tourist books (the Lonely Planet guide) and the history books, I decided to get a copy of "Istanbul: A Memoir" by the author Orhan Pamuk. I had been familiar with his work since reading a story about his arrest and trial by the Turkish government for making a comment about the Armenian genocide in his novel "Snow," published last year. He was, thankfully, acquitted, but for an author to suffer punishment for writing what is historical fact (or even a reasonable historical interpretation) is highly offensive to me.

Anyway, I read his memoir of his hometown, and it was an excellent book, a mixture of dryly ironic commentary on how his city has consistently thrown away its Turkish charm to appear ever more Western in the last 200 years as well as personal history about his own life and his family. He even manages to comment on the endemic stray dogs in Turkey (which I happened to see first hand). So, what does this have to do with predicting the Nobel Prize? Well, I thought I would attract a great deal of scrutiny for bringing such a pro-Western author to Turkey, but it turns out that customs in Turkey is rather non-rigorous and my bags were not even searched. Towards the end of my trip to Turkey, I found out that Orhan Pamuk had won the Nobel Prize for Literature, becoming the first Turk to win a Nobel Prize. And I could say (sorta) that I knew (of) him back when. At least this is a better story than my discovery of Ricky Martin before he became a big success (shifts eyes).

Irony #2: The Crime of the Armenian Genocide in Turkey and France

I commented earlier how one of my friends who was in Turkey with me was Armenian, and this particular irony is a rather cruel one. According to basic Turkish law, it is a crime to affirm the existence of the Armenian genocide. In fact, the crime is punishable (if one is convicted) by up to 3 years of prison time. This has long been a sticking point in the Turkish attempts to enter the European Union. After all, if Germans are forced to recognize the Holocost (as they do), then it would only be fair to expect other nations to admit their own historical misdeeds. Not that it is very pleasant business to admit massacres. Which Americans would want all of the American Indian massacres to be endlessly displayed prominently in accounts about the United States, after all?

Anyway, France passed, on October 12th, a law that made it a crime in France to deny the Armenian massacre. That puts any Turks who go between France and Turkey in a difficult position, at least if they are forced to confront the issue in both countries. The whole issue strikes me as rather grimly ironic in that two nations noted in the Christian and Muslim worlds, respectively, for their rather anti-religious secular stands are making such a religious issue (if I may use the term) over history. At any rate, I (somehow) avoided being arrested while in Turkey while delicately explaining the issue and at least strongly hinting at my own opinion on the matter. At least the rioting going on in Istanbul while we were there was against someone other than the United States. It was nice to see protests against another nation for a change.

Trouble In Paradise

For the last dozen years or so, it was widely thought in Thailand (and elsewhere) that the King of Thailand (who is quite beloved to people I know personally as supposedly having the best interests of his people at heart) was a bulwark for democracy in a part of the world that has known mostly dictators in the post-colonial period.

Of course, that is no longer the case as the King of Thailand has supported a coup by a Muslim General against a corrupt but populist democratic government. As is always the case in this sort of coup where rule of law is trampled by tyranny there is always some sort of specious justification--usually involving the attempt to get rid of corruption (even though undemocratic leadership is almost invariably more corrupt than democratic leadership even of the wickedest variety), or the need to cure pressing military problems that a general would be expected to know better than an elected politician.

The truth is that even though democracies are far from perfect governments, they are better at governing just about anything than any form of unrepresentative government. Generally speaking, democracies depend on the vigilance of the people (who themselves, in many politically immature systems, do not seek to be responsible as adults). Democracies, however, allow the governened to hold their leaders accountable for their actions, which is the most effective form of preventing corruption and keeping leaders reined in (which is sadly necessary at all times and in all situations). In all other forms of government, there is some form of force or fraud that prevents people from having rightful supervision over their government. In the case of a military government, the modus operendi is that of force, where men (and possibly women) with automatic machine guns prevent people from exercising their God-given rights. In that of a monarchy, the modus operendi is fraud, where a leader perports to have some sort of divine or semi-divine status that puts such a leader beyond scrutiny and criticism from mere commoners. In Thailand, the current situation has a little bit of both flavors of tyranny.

Despite the promises that some form of autocracy will be more efficient and effective than a democratic form of government, the truth invariably demonstrates that any gain in stability depends upon massive atrocities and only temporarily hides the disasters that threaten society, and exacerbate their results (see Congo, Iraq, Nepal, etc.). In addition, the threat of military force at the slightest problem a democracy faces prevents the citizenry of a given nation from developing the necessary maturity to make democracy work. Democracy is not an easy business--it depends on there being an active citizenry with the expectation that laws will be obeyed by all--including lawmakers, soldiers, and other officials of the state. It also depends on a citizenry that is willing to demand their rights (even at a cost) and accept the responsibilities for ensuring that no one abuses their power. This is the responsibility of adults, who are capable of dividing right from wrong and are able to handle solid intellectual and moral food rather than the milk of civics lessons.

What is currently going on in Thailand at best will end up in a situation like Nepal (where popular demonstrations forced the fall of the autocratic monarchial rule) and Argentina (where a disastrous military conflict ended the rule of a military junta not unlike Thailand's current leadership). At worst, dictatorships can linger on indefinitely despite failures in solving the military problems that bring them to power (see Pakistan, Myanmar), or can even threaten the absolute dissolution of a nation (see Somalia, Ethiopia, Iraq, Congo, Serbia, etc.) and attract foreign military operations. It is far better, given this grim picture, for a nation to tough out the inevitable rough periods of an early democracy and form their own solutions to problems that allow for minority rights as well as majority rule, lead to more egalitarian social structures and the elimination of immoral systems of social division that deny the natural equality of humanity, all issues of massive difficulty that demand gradual and patient work. In no nation can these tasks be considered completed, but only in a society of mature political citizens can such tasks even be partially resolved in a lasting and beneficial fashion.

Sadly, these basic lessons are too often ignored, both by people with power who become addicted to position and authority and who forget that what is best for them is seldom best for the people as a whole (even paternalistic authoritarianism is an unrighteous form of government). While it may seem expedient in such cases to temporarily withhold democracy in order to deal with pressing problems, the skills in creating and maintaining a democracy can only be learned through struggling through trials. As painful as such difficulties may be for a nation, it is necessary for a society to endure such difficulties so that they may grow in maturity. To treat the citizenry of a society as children forever is to deny the promise that God provide to us as rulers. If we are to rule effectively over others, we must be able to rule over ourselves and develop self-control, patience, and resopnsibility. This can only be learned in an egalitarian society where people are resopnsible for their own actions without being able to rely on the commands of others who claim some sort of superiority to them.

How long will the simple love simplicity (for nothing in this world is truly simple)? It seems, in much of the world, that it will be for at least a while longer.

The Imaginary Engineer

For those who do not know, I am a graduate student in Industrial Engineering (Engineering Management) at the University of South Florida. During a discussion in class yesterday (Tuesday, 9/12) our class (and professor) had a rather passionate discussion of what makes Industrial Engineering such an obscure and misunderstood part of the engineering profession (thankfully no one has asked me about the Taylor motion studies--yet).

My background, to be fair, is not that of industrial engineering. Until I was well into college (my junior year, to be precise), I had scarcely heard anything at all about Industrial Engineering, despite being very active in the engineering school and finding acquaintances from a wide variety of engineering disciplines. My background is Civil (Structural) Engineering. While people may not know my specialty is buildings (most people, for some reason, automatically think of bridges), at least some people have an idea of what civil engineers do. Maybe a woefully small percentage of this world, but a recognizable portion nevertheless. Industrial engineering lacks even this sort of common understanding.

This may not be a bad thing. When people do know about Industrial Engineering, they inevitably misunderstand it (I will refrain, at this time, from extending that comment into a general thesis of my endeavors). The name Industrial Engineering itself is somewhat off-putting. People think of factories and assembly line processes when they think of Industrial Engineering. While this is certainly a part of the field, it is a very small part (in this country--not so in areas of the world where primary manufacturing actually goes on). For the most part, Industrial Engineering can be (perhaps a tad misleadingly) simplied as management for and of smart people. In particular, Industrial Engineering looks at the processes (both in procedures and power relationships as well as in technology and equipment) that lead to efficiency as well as effectiveness in management (including the management of engineers--who in a previous discussion in another class of mine had very little nice to say about MBA's without an engineering background). A look at my classes in my curriculum sheet will give some idea as to the sorts of material an industrial engineer would study on the master's degree level:

Principles of Engineering Management
Management of Technological Change
Technology and Finance
Engineering Management Policy and Strategies
Statistical Design Models
Work Design and Productivity
Total Quality Management Strategies
Occupational Safety Engineering
Project Management
ISO 9000/14000
Benchmarking

In other words, the field of Industrial Engineering is one of those hybrid fields between engineering (with its focus on technical and technological solutions to the problems of mankind) and concerns of management (even adopting some of the jargon of management, like Total Quality Management and Six Sigma and so forth, as well as the concern of finances). This sort of blend has led Industrial Engineers to market themselves (when they do market themselves, which is not often, apparently) as engineering without the math (and by math engineers mean such things as differential equations and matrix analysis). The fact that Industrial Engineering is not as heavy in high level mathematics has led many other (perhaps envious) engineering students to label Industrial Engineers as "Imaginary Engineers."

I find this to be amusing, but others are perhaps less amused by this. Every major, at least in engineering, has some sort of insult attached to it (my favorite for the civil engineering profession: mechanical engineers build weapons; civil engineers build targets--and my favorite for engineers in general is: What do engineers use for birth control? Their personalities.). Industrial Engineers seem to have done a poor job of marketing themselves. This is perhpas ironic, but it is not a serious problem to me (I generally have a severe distaste for the inevitable distortion and oversimplification that results from marketing efforts, even if I recognize the necessity of successful marketing to make sure the needs of people are met, even when those needs are not originally known or felt). As it is, there are few industrial engineers in this world, and few people know what they do or how important they are. This was the source of some humor in the classroom as well.

I suppose I could go on much longer, but the basic point has been made and I have other ways to spend my time then endlessly pontificate on an obscure field most people reading this are probably quite unfamiliar with. At any rate, hopefully this has been a useful update as to how I spend my time when I am not ranting about some topic, and about why my updates are so infrequent. Regardless, until my next post, fare thee well.

They got no clues and they wanna get warmer, but Nate won't turn informer...

Alright, I suppose that not many people will be familiar with the bad one-hit wonder lyrics (For those who are really curious, they happen to be from Snow's "Informer."). However, there is a serious point to the rather flippant title. Currently, the nation of Romania has been faced with a growing furor over the release of files about the secret service during the Communist regime. Apparently, the nation of Romania had 700,000 informers in a population of only 21,000,000 people. Seriously, that is one informer for every thirty people. And people think I'm paranoid.

Anyway, with all that snooping going on, it appears that some skeletons hidden deep in closets are being revealed in a rather unpleasant manner. For example, one respected former BBC reporter (according to an AP article on this topic by Allison Multer) apparently was snooping on his friend, a poet, because he had made a fellow university classmate pregnant and refused to marry her. For this the government blackmailed him. At least his friend, upon finding out what was reported, had the kind heart to forgive the reporter for what was "neutral" information. Many others were not so fortunate.

What makes someone turn informer? It is a frightening thing when societies become so dark, and so incapable of handling matters openly and honestly that they must sneak around in dark corners trying to find all sorts of unpleasant information to turn family members and friends against each other. It's a terrible world when people seek to extort and blackmail others because of our human mistakes in order to make us tools of oppressive tyrannical government. *Shivers*.

It is rather easy in such cases to think the problem exists merely in other societies, particualrly communist or Facist societies. It is certainly true that totalitarian societies tend to have a lot of this sort of informing going on. However, paranoia does not merely exist in societies like Stalin's Russia, Ceaucescu's Romania, or Hitler's Germany. Elizabethan England, for example, had much the same problem. Such informing has existed in our own society before as well, and may yet again.

However, such a paranoid society cannot exist without willing participants. In societies that depend on secretive behavior and the paranoia of thought control, much still depends on the courage and strength of people to thwart the wickedness of corrupt leaders and their shady minions. It may be a regrettable necessity (and I think it is both regrettable and necessary) that we all live at least somewhat secretive lives, in at least certain ways. We call such secrecy privacy after all, and value it highly.

If the rise of snooping technology allows every moment of our lives, and every word we say (or write) fodder for prying and unfriendly eyes, we still do not have to cower in fear if wicked people seek to use such knowledge against us. We have the choice, if we are brave enough, to face up to what we have done and refuse to collaborate with any kind of secret police force. The choice and the responsibility are ours, and we must all face on our own, at some time, the bitter choice between living an honest and candid life and giving in to the temptations of an easier and less complicated life. Nothing worthwhile is simple anyway. Everything is complicated, and those who have easy answers speak without wisdom and understanding. And sometimes, there are no good choices, but merely a choice about whether we are to suffer in one way or another.

Whichever path one chooses in such occasions, though, there is a lot of sympathy from me for such people. After all, those who inform on the lower level are often fairly ordinary people, and often feel the greatest amount of guilt and suffering for what they do, because they do not have the defenses of habitualization that numb and harden the conscience against wrongdoing that come for those higher in authority. Even so, regardless of what one chooses, sometimes there is a bitter price we must pay. It is useful to reflect upon that sometimes.

Planetary Bodies

A group of astronomers have decided to tackle the thorny issue of planetary definitions, a task that has grown more controversial in recent years. They have proposed a hard and fast definition for planets with three components: 1)Planets must be 500 miles in diamater or larger. 2)Planets must orbit a sun. 3)Planets must be circular with self-gravity. This last qualification is the toughest, surprisingly enough, disqualifying earth's moon (whose shared center of gravity with the earth is outside of the moon).

If this definition of planets is accepted, it would mean that there would be 12 currently recognized planets, with the possibility of many more in the future. Besides the eight planets recognized without controversy (Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune), and my favorite, albeit controversial planet (Pluto), there would be three more planets: Ceres (the largest member of the astroid belt), Charon (Pluto's moon, which would be promoted to the solar system's first "double planet"), and Xena (a recently discovered Kuiper belt object--like Pluto and Charon--slightly larger than Pluto). Of course, any object in the solar system that met the three defintions above would also have to be added to this list.

This would mean that other definitions would have to change. Astroids and comets, for example, could no longer be called "minor planets" or "planetoids" as they currently are. As for whatever heavenly bodies met the definition of planet, they would fall into one of three categories. The first is the inner planets (Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, and Ceres (?)) which are rocky planets of small to moderate size that have a regular orbit and are kept warm to hot by the sun. The second group of planets would be made up of the gas giants (Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune) that are all of large size, with regular orbits, and have a large number of moons. Any of these moons that had self-gravity would also be planets as well, though this does not appear to be the case at all at the current time. Finally, the third group of planets in the solar system would be called "plutons," which are small, cold, distant, dark, and have eccentric orbits. Is it any wonder I like this type of planet so much? Included in this type of planet would be Pluto, Charon, Xena (or whatever they rename it) and any other large spherical Kuiper Belt Objects.


I don't know about you, but I have to salute the 17 year old blogger who mobilized a "save Pluto" campaign and thus influenced astronomers to come up with a consistent definition of a planet, even if it means that textbooks will have to be edited accordingly. At least my beloved Pluto remains a planet, with some new company to boot.

Las Islas Malvinas

I had wanted to write about the Tour de France, but the recent scandal concerning Floyd Landis' win provided a rather cynical story, and though I'm not opposed to those in principle I figured I wanted something with a grim sense of humor rather than an almost Greek tragedy of hubris.

So today I looked at a lovely article which talked about recent problems between Britain and Argentina over some remote rocky islands in the South Atlantic, a few hundred miles off the Argentine coast. These islands were the cause of the Faulklands War in 1982, when I was all of a year old. The upside of this war was enshrining Prime Minister Thatcher as the "Iron Lady" and the collapse of the military dictatorship in Argentina (always a cause for celebration). Of course, this did not settle the issue.

After all, the Fauklands (called by South Americans Las Islas Malvinas) have been an international issue since at least the 1770's. At that time they were empty islands belonging to the crown of Spain. During the collapse of Spain's colonial empire, England began to increase their presence in that part of the world. For example, St. Helena, an island only a few hundred miles away in an equally barren part of the South Atlantic, was the final prison of Napoleon. So some British settlers came to eke out a rough existence of fishing and sheepbreeding (woot) while Argentina was fighting for its independence.

Of course, once Argentina had its independence and government settled (a task that lasted until the 1860's) they wanted the islands back, but it was tough luck, as the British were not interested in returning the islands. Once the British Empire itself fell apart, the Faulklands took on an intense symbolic meaning for both nations, far beyond its actual value (it is a net money loser for England, but that hardly matters when national pride is at stake). For Argentina, the islands symbolize a part of the Argentine homeland that has been taken from them. For the British, the Faulklands are a symbol of glory and empire that has not yet completely died out.

So, what will come of this round of what is currently economic warfare? It is hard to say, but such cases as this are ones I tend to find great amusement (perhaps that is the wrong word) in. How about you?

The Next Oil Sheikdom?

While making my merry way through the news stories this evening, I came across a rather entertaining item about a land few people associate with oil, or for much of anything other than perhaps a failed Norweigian colony that died out in the 1400's, or some Inuit perhaps, or maybe lots and lots of snow. This land is ironically enough called Greenland, and if some oil companies have their way, this sparsely populated arctic desert of some 58,000 mostly Eskimo inhabitants will be rolling in plenty of green.

Somewhere under the rapidly thinning icecap of Greenland lies a lot of oil--by some estimates, half of the supply in Saudi Arabia (which is quite impressive by any standards). Until recently, this oil has been impossible to get at, because even though 110 billion gallons of oil is a huge amount, digging through a mile of ice is less than appealing, even with the drillbits at the disposal of the oil companies. Of course, now that Greenland's ice is melting like a snowcone on a hot summer day, it is rather ironic that this brings even more oil (and in a relatively peaceful part of the world) close to the surface, where it can be explored and exploited.

The residents of Greenland hope that the possible wealth brought to them by oil concessions allows them to become independent from Denmark. After all, the Danes have ruled this forsaken glacial wilderness since establishing some colonies on the coastal fringes of the rather icy land, which currently makes most of its income on fishing and depends on subsidies from Coopenhagen to survive. If the oil of Greenland can be tapped, though, Greenland seeks to become the next Kuwait.

Of course, not everyone is thrilled about the prospect of intense oil business in what has hitherto been a very remote portion of the earth. Greenpeace and the World Wildlife Fund have expressed concern over possible harm to the whale and seabird population that currently dwells in a land with relatively little direct human impact. Of course, since Greenlanders are seeing plenty of cash opportunities with their oil reserves, it is likely that if the oil can be found, those seabirds and whales are probably just going to have to go elsewhere.

That is, unless oil is found on Baffin Island.

Wise Fools In Shakespeare

I recently received a lovely one-volume Oxford Complete Works of Shakespeare, as Shakespeare has long been a favorite playwright of mine. Despite having lived more than four hundred years ago, his plays speak to modern concerns about militarism (Coriolanus), relations between church and state (King Henry VIII, King John), the difference between fantasy and reality (The Tempest, A Winter's Tale, A Midsummer Night's Dream), the problems of feminism (Taming of the Shrew, All's Well That Ends Well), the problems of legitimacy of authority (all of the historical plays, especially Richard II and Richard III, as well as Henry V, besides Macbeth and Hamlet, and other plays besides this), racism (The Merchant of Venice, Othello), problems in dealing with old age (King Lear), the problems of premature romance (Romeo & Juliet), the effects of moral depravity on society (Trolius and Cressida, Measure For Measure), the difficulties in maintaining one's morality in a corrupt society (Measure For Measure as well as Perseus) and so on and so forth. Rare among fiction authors, there are few areas of human behavior that Shakespeare does not touch on in his 40 plays (this includes the 36 plays of his first folio, Perseus, The Two Noble Kinsmen, Edward III, and the long lost Cardenio).

However, today I would like to discuss an odd character perhaps best exemplified in Twelfth Night's Feste and King Lear's Fool, something that this society could probably use more of. That is the phenomenon of the wise fool. Both of these characters are the wisest and most clear-headed of all the characters in their respective plays. The fool had a valuable place in the society of the Middle Ages and the early modern period. The fool, rare among people, had freedom of speech, and was expected to make witty and sarcastic comments about rulers and courtiers alike. In a society (not unlike many parts of our own society) where flattery of leaders was treasured and bluntspoken honesty was not, the fool could speak the truth, and would find his words laughed at and appreciated rather than punished and censured. This is because the fool had no political ambitions, and his honesty and skill at witty sarcasm earned him his keep, rather than the decietful words of lying advisors with their own personal agendas. A wise ruler paid close attention to his fool, and woe falls to the ruler who does not keep an honest fool (like Richard II) or does not pay sufficient attention to his fool (King Lear).

Indeed, Shakespeare's plays are set up so that those characters who mock fools, even in comedies (Twelfth Night's Malvolio) end up badly. This is because Shakespeare's fools, though their language is sometimes cryptic (though most often not terribly difficult to discover), are quite honest truthtellers. Perhaps Shakespeare saw himself as a bit of a fool--his job being to entertain the public, but also seeing himself as a wise and knowledgeable spectator of human behavior, capable of delivering great insight to those who took his words seriously. Indeed, it is the disguising of great wisdom in the guise of folly (because most people, except the most tiresome and serious among us, will choose frivolity and entertainment over serious subjects) that allows his points to sink home so well, and accounts for his lasting fame and his appeal to scholarly minds and constant reinterpretations (witness the recent movies Ten Things I Hate About You, O, She's The Man, besides the various Kenneth Barnaugh adaptations of Shakespeare's plays). Shakespeare neither bored his audience by being too serious (he would throw in passionate lovers, mistaken identities, fighting, songs, and spectacles to keep the peanut gallery entertained), but he never sold out to merely creating worthless entertainment. Even his most superficial of plays contains much of depth and interest that is worthy of serious reflection. This is because Shakespeare himself was quite astute in viewing people and had a solid grounding in classical literature from the sacred (the Bible), to historical works in his own language (Holinshed's Chronicles), as well as classic literature in several languages (Latin, Italian, and French, at the very least).

It is a shame we in our modern society suffer from a lack of wise fools. That is not to say we do not have fools (I would consider myself one, and in various fashions I am sure others would agree--some in the friendlier sense of a Feste, others perhaps in a more Proverbial sense for those more hostile). Our society has no lack of people who speak and write as experts on subjects, but these people all seem to be motivated by some kind of positional ambition or some kind of ulterior motives and thus are difficult to trust. Instead of the reminders of King Lear's fool about the need for social justice, we have films made by politically ambitious actors ("Syriana") or dramatically challenged failed politicians ("An Inconvenient Truth"). In short, we have plenty of self-proclaimed wise men, and plenty of fools, but no wise fools whose truth-telling is divorced from political spin and the need to dissemble for one's own ambitions of wealth, power, and influence. The wise fool is necessary precisely because he is free of such concerns, and so can fulfill the request of David in Psalm 141:5 to provide stinging, but ultimately beneficial, truth. A wise fool specializes in constructive critism--never going overboard either with flattery or with railing and hostile accusations. Personally, it is a balance I myself wish to find--someday...

Brief Father's Day Reflections....

This Father's Day Ihad the chance to see my best friend and his daughter, just over a year old, just learning how to walk, and very curious about her surroundings. As a frequent spectator of other people, it was interesting to see the trust that was there between parent and child. The little one would run out a slight distance (no more than fifteen feet) and then run back to be held safely. Such things are deeply touching, and a reflection of how life ought to be.

It was nice to spend father's day with my friends, even if my tennis game was cancelled on account of lightning. Spending time with friends (at any rate, not spending it alone in social misanthropy) is a valuable thing, and I am thankful to have friends. It is especially valuable on a day like Father's Day, where for the first time I must mourn the passing of my father, rather than buy him dryly humorous and somewhat mocking father's day cards that poke fun of the passage of time. That said, it is late, and though there is much I wish to say, there is no time, so I must bid farewell until another day.

P.S. Anonymous posting is now disabled. Nathan out.

Coming From Where I'm From

In communication, it is vitally important to know one's audience. If one is going to communicate effectively to others, one has to know the hopes and fears of those one is speaking with (or writing to), what issues (and words) set them off, and the motivations and experiences of the audience. Often, what works very well for one person or group of people may fail miserably with a different audience. In speaking, or in targeted writing (e-mails, letters, etc.), one has a definite audience in mind, and should write or speak accordingly. In cases such as this blog, for example, it is notoriously difficult to know exactly who my audience is. In such a case as this I know my audience generally from comments (thank you, brave respondents) as well as from the occasional complaints, often relayed via third parties (I would hope I am not that unapproachable of a person). If it were possible, I would speak in a way that would be true to my own experiences as well as avoid causing offense to those whose generational persepctive and personal experiences do not match with my own. To a large extent, this is not possible, and so I leave room for those who take issue with my words to speak to me and request clarification or explanation.

I recently had a rather stern debate with an older person before services. Now, I am not the sort of person who goes looking for debates, but I do tend to be somewhat prickly when people begin insulting my generation (of which I am a vociferous and fierce defender). So a somewhat cranky older person decides to take a swipe at me and comment that he is fifty years older than me, asking me if I had anything to tell him. I asked him if his time was well spent, and he proceeded to go into a litany about how young people lack discline and a sense of obedience to their elders, and gave the rather tired comment that our generation feels overly entitled (while this may be true in large part, I concede, I have to say we learned from the best in the previous generation, made of up largely whiny middle aged people, including this gentleman, who themselves have felt entitled their entire lives, and show little sign of stopping now). In the end, as we verbally fenced about his military experiences (I decided to charitably pass on without mention on his litigious ways of suing and appealing for early social security and medicare so that he can receive his living and health insurance off of my diligent labor) and about the situations and conditions where obedience to God and man is necessary (we both agreed that obedience to God is not contingent on everything, and agreed that where man's commands contradict God's we are duty bound to disobey the orders of human beings), we were not particularly far apart as far as where we stood.

That is not to say that there were not levels of disagreement (he tended to look nostalgically on certain rather authoritarian figures that I feel much more ambivalent about, and he gave less room for legitimate dissent), but our differences were more about words than about beliefs. The way he expressed himself about the ideal younger generation struck me as seeking a mindless and robotic obedience, and no one should expect anything mindless about anything I do. "Because I said so" does not suffice as a reason, and it is good to some extent that the culture of deference is no more. That said, the general collapse of credibility among authority figures is not without extreme difficulties and major problems. It would be nice if leaders could be trusted, but as they cannot be trusted, we should act accordingly and not pretend otherwise. We must judge orders and the actions of others on a case-by-case basis, and cannot assume that others have our best interests at heart without proof.

It is here where the differences between us were most profound. Our differences in language (which were largely reflective of generational differences, but in my case colored rather strongly by personal experience) were reflective of the differences in trust between the two of us. His trust allows him to grant a wide latitude towards authority figures, where as my mistrust does not. To him, until proven otherwise, leaders exert their power for good. To me, until proven otherwise, those with power are an active threat to my well-being and security. Even to the extent that both of us agree that obedience to man's laws (and, less seriously, orders and requests from other authority figures like bosses and so forth) where they do not contradict God's laws (and both of us do agree on that point), the emphasis we choose to make and the level of trust forms a huge and rather suspicious gulf. He (and no doubt others who share his perspective) sees my suspicion (and that of other young people) as rebelliousness, a lack of discipline, and a lack of the honor and respect he feels entitled to.

As a young person, I am all to aware (if not particularly thrilled) with the fact that it is necessary for me to pay my dues and show myself worthy of respect, especially as there is a natural suspicion of older people for me as well as the age group I represent. That said, there are mutual expecations. I expect others to pay their dues as well. If older generations wish to be respected by young people, there are obligations they must meet as well. These include wise counsel (demonstrated not merely in words, but in actions, because I find it difficult in my life to find anyone who sets a positive example for me to follow in many areas). They also include opportunities for mentoring (again, I have a difficult time finding anyone who could be a worthy mentor). They also include a commitment to providing opportunities for responsibility (this is an area in which older generations have, in my experience, shown themselves worthy) as well as provide honor and respect for a job well done, rather than only insults and ridicule and censure. It is easier to give honor and respect when it is due when one receives it when it is due also.

It is difficult for me to convey my own life experiences in ways that older generations would understand, and the reverse is certainly true. Their life experiences and social environment is much different from my own, and I do not know if the gap can be bridged based on the current sort of communication that goes on. What they have as memories, often nostalgic memories, are for me historical knowledge that bring no joy and are often tinged with more than a little envy and regret. Both sides of the gulf have expectations of the other that are not fulfilled, and there seems to be little way of communicating the mutual unmet needs and wants across the distance of language and time unless both are willing to step halfway. When and if that happens, who can know? For now, though, it appears my interlocutor and I are stuck on opposite sides looking warily at each other, each waiting for the other to take the first step.

Growing Up Grimaldi

The Grimaldis are one of Europe's oldest dynasties, little princlets of Monaco. Recently, though, this wealthy microstate (much smaller than the new nation of Montenegro) has fallen somewhat on hard times. When Prince Ranier died, his son Albert took the throne. Albert has never married, and thus has no legitimate heirs. However, he now has to add another illegitimate child to the list (his second confirmed one to date), a 14 year old Palm Springs girl (I've seen her birth certificate, but there is no point in naming her) who is the daughter of a former waitress who conceived the regal love-child while on vacation in Monaco. The mother of Albert's first recognized heir is a Togolese (that is, inhabitant of Togo, a slender West African nation next to Ghana) flight attendant.

It seems that Mr. Grimaldi has rather unusual state for his baby mamas (and I use this in the technical sense). Here he is, a multi-millionare, among the wealthiest rulers on the face of the earth, and yet his children do not come from a wife (he is unmarried), nor even mistresses, but rather flings. At least one admirable thing may be said about him--he is rather egalitarian in his tastes of women (he even apparently shows no racial prejudices, in that at least one of his children is bi-racial). At least these positive things may be said about him, because although he appears to have no problem fathering children, he does have difficulty (from all appearances) in finding the right kind of woman to settle down with.

There are apparently not that many classy and eligible ladies who would wish to marry a prince these days, I assume. His mother was Grace Kelly, an actress to be sure, but a classy and elegant one. Even beyond marriage, though, it appears that Prince Albert has a hard time finding someone worth dating or courting. I'm sure he could take the advice the rather fluffy rom-com (that is, romantic comedy) "The Prince and Me" and find a nice college girl to date. After all, his eldest child will, in the next few years, be looking at college, and will be flagrantly inelegible for financial aid now that she is the recognized daughter of the Prince of Monaco. So, while the Prince (we presume, or his handlers) is looking around at nice colleges for his firstborn daughter, perhaps he could find a classy lady for himself. After all, in this day and age, bastardy can get rather expensive.

I do feel bad for the young lady, though. She has all sorts of reporters and investigators around her school. Hopefully she can receive some sort of renumeration for what is likely to be a lot of unfriendly attention. As for the Prince, let us hope that his wild days are over. Child support is expensive, especialy when you're worth hundreds of millions of dollars. One hopes that, even if belatedly, Albert will prove to be a good father. He certainly looks to have some practice to come in the near future in that regard.

Rebirth of a Nation

Yesterday the people of Montenegro voted to declare their independence from Serbia by a margin of 0.4% (according to the various press reports) over the 55% supramajoritarian level set by the European Union. This little nation of 670,000 inhabitants hopes that its independence will speed its acceptance into the EU. For the last three years it has (without authorization from the EU, to boot) used the Euro as its sole currency, not accepting the Serbian dinar.

I happen to have a liking for Macedonia, I must admit. While it has only been recognized as an independent nation between 1878 and 1918, when it was a small "tintin" monarchy ruled by one of those Eastern European dynasties with unpronounceable names that fell after WWI, Macedonia is the only area of the Balkans to have never been conquered by the Ottoman Turks. The remote forested mountains of this area (which gave the land its name--Montenegro means "black mountain" in Italian, named after the Venetians who lusted after conquering its shores for their maritime empire). The land of Montenegro is roughtly coincident with one of the earliest "Serbian" states, that of Zeta, which was first organized around 1000AD. It's not as if Montenegro is a new nation in any sense.

The loss of Montenegro spells the bitter end of Serbian hegenomy over "Greater Serbia," as it is the fifth territory to declare independence after the collapse of Yugoslavia in 1992. It follows Slovenia (the only former Yugoslav Republic to enter the EU, and another favorite little state of mine), Croatia, Bosnia, and Macedonia to declare its independence. Kossovo, a mostly Albanian territory conquered by Serbia during the First Balkan War, looks to declare its independence later this year. After 1878, Serbia looked to swallow its smaller neighbors and rule over the southern slavs as their "elder brother," a dream that turned into a nightmare in the 1990's with ugly nationalistic wars and massacres in Croatia, Bosnia, and Kossovo. Serbia's territory is now limited to "core Serbia," its territories in 1878, as well as Vojvodina, the territory it gained after WWI as a reward for fighting against Austria-Hungary.

Of course, Montenegro's reward for allying with its Serbian cousins and standing up to Austria-Hungary was losing its independence and being treated until WWII (when the little land was popular with the Communist partisans of Tito) as a province of Serbia. I am hopeful that this little mountainous coastal land (for various reasons I have an affinity for independent-minded hill people) can manage to thrive as an independent nation. It has ports (something that Serbia, now a landlocked country, lacks), and its beautiful coastline attracts tourists. Despite having only 9% of the population of what remained of Yugoslavia, its economy was responsible for (statistics say) 15% of the economy. This means that though Montenegro will be a small nation, it is a promising one economically.

The main problem I see with Montenegro is its leadership. A chameleon-like former Communist protege of Milosevic rules over Montenegro, and there are unpleasant stories of Moldovan sex slaves and cigarette (!) smuggling. That said, the future looks more promising for Montenegro as an independent nation than as an appendage of a vestigial Yugoslavia. We shall see what happens with this latest little nation, which once again joins the community of independent peoples.

Got 'Roids?

What do the following names have in common:

Barry Bonds
Marion Jones
Tim Montgomery
Zhanna Block
Regina Jacobs
Dwain Chambers
Kelli White
Kevin Toth
Michelle Collins
The entire Seattle Supersonics teams from 1992-1994
Michael Chang
Bill Romanowski
Jim Courier
Dan Marino
Bryce Paup
Ivan Lendl
Terrell Davis
Mac Wilkins
Neil Smith
Terry Kirby
Milos Sarcev
Greg Tafralis
Mike Buncic
Jim Quinn
John Hill
Mike Swain
Lynn Roethke
Kevin Asano
Will Willis
Matt Guisto
Wolfgang Schmidt
Michael Ashley
Nancy Lewis
Corrine Shigemoto
Robert Harrop
Flex Wheeler
Ronnie Coleman
Kevin Levrone
Mike Matarozzo
Chris Cormier
Gunter Schlierkamp
Roland Kickinger
Eddie Robinson
Don Long
Emeric Delczeg
Vickie Gates
Nancy Lewis
Rich Gaspari
Max Shmaya

Give up? All of these people are athletes and body builders listed on the website for Scientific Nutrition For Advanced Conditioning (SNAC for short, they were formerly called Balco and their website is http://www.snac.com) as having used the supplements from Balco during the last fifteen years.

In case you have lived under a rock for the last few years, you know that Balco is famous for steroids. Though their website only sells what appear to be rather tame, and somewhat overpriced, supplements of dubious quality, for many years (and possibily still today) their bread and butter has been selling steriods to athletes. Some of the names on that list above have been caught and punished for steriods--including Tim Montgomery, a disgraced (and now retired) track and field star, Kelli White (who had to forfeit her Olympic gold medals from Sydney after failing a steriod exam), Bill Romanowski (who is a convicted felon, from a plea deal, for trying to deal prescription drugs, if I remember correctly, besides his drug suspensions from the NFL). Some of these names are under a dark cloud of suspicion for steriod use (such as Barry Bonds and Marion Jones).

However, due to the actions of Balco and many of the athletes on this list, all of the remaining people on the list can be considered under suspicion for being steriod users, which is not only unethical, but illegal. Some of these names, such as Tommy Chang and Dan Marino, are pretty spotless thus far, but may yet be dragged into the mire by the general reputation of the other names on the list. When one deals with corrupt people, and that corruption becomes plainly obvious, the issue of reputation becomes rather difficult. Bad company, after all, corrupts good habits. Are any of the names on this list clean? We cannot know. Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence.

Nonetheless, we live in very corrupt times. It is difficult to trust anything, and all too easy to doubt everything. Where people and organizations and societies live in the shadows, it is rather uncomfortable to come into the harsh light of day. While we can safely say that anyone that does not relish accountability has something to hide, the truth is that we all (in at least some respects) do as well. Because we all wish for our own private spaces and personal lives, to do what we wish without prying and unsympathetic eyes, we all have earned the world we live in. Our cheaters and scoundrels represent us all, whether we like it or not, because they represent the uncomfortable truth often in our actions (if not in our beliefs) that wealth, security, power, and fame are what matters, and getting and holding onto it are what matters, no matter what that means.

Depressing examples of that abound, but it is sad when we cannot even go to a baseball game without wondering if that too is corrupted by our desire to get and stay ahead at any cost, and cannot even read a novel without having to wonder if that has been cheated and stolen too.

Cinco De Mayo

Today I spent lunch at Don Pablo's, sitting at the bar in a crowded Mexican restaurant eating steak fajitas and wondering what bad luck it was for the new manager of that particular location. Since I tend to eat out alone, I have little else to do during lunch than try to pay attention to those around me. Today was not a good day for the manager of the restaurant. He was understaffed, even though he had nearly twice as many servers coming as usual. He ran out of certain supplies--the blender stopped working, he was out of many draft beers (fortunately, I ordered root beer), and life was not good. Even worse, representatives from the "corporate office" were in the restaurant today, there was a wait of an hour and a half for a table (and two hours for a takeourt order). Needless to say, the situation looked rather grim. The restaurant was still packed when I finished lunch around 2PM (I started lunch rather late at 1PM). Next year, I am sure the manager will know better and will plan ahead for Cinco de Mayo, which happens to be a hugely important day in Mexican culture.

It is a rare culture that celebrates its defeats. The Serbians, for example, annually celebrate their crushing defeat at the Battle of Kossovo in 1389, where they were anhiliated by the Ottomon army, leaving Serbia an Ottomon territory for 350 years. One can understand that the Serbians will probably remember the second defeat of Kossovo in 1998 a long time as well. The Mexicans too, celebrate a day of defeat. The Battle of Pueblo was fought on May 5, 1862, during the French invasion of Mexico. The Mexicans were defeated in this invasion in the short term, as the French set up Archduke Maxmillian as the Emperor of Mexico.

The only reason the French were able to do this was because the United States was fighting the Civil War. Abraham Lincoln (and the North in general) were staunch supporters of the Mexican republican government, led by a decent and democratic Mestizo named Benito Juarez. He happened to be the only decent leader Mexico had during the 19th century, and possibly ever. Since he inherited some debts from previous leaders, the French used that as a cover to take over the country and eliminate democracy in Mexico. The South was generally sympathetic to the cause of global tyranny, and sought to be recognized by France, so they did not hinder the French invasion at all.

After the American Civil War ended, the United States sent 50,000 troops under General Philip Sheridan to the border of Mexico to let the French know of American displeasure about their imperial adventure. The French took the hint and removed their troops, and Maxmillian was executed by a firing squad. Sadly, Juarez was only able to hold office for four more years after the occupation was ended.

Perhaps the Mexicans and Serbians celebrate the days of their military defeats for reasons which only small nations can understand. Mind you, these small nations (both Mexico and Serbia) are quite capable of bullying other, smaller nations (witness the fate of Central American illegal immigrants in Mexico or the fate of Bosnian or Kossovar Muslims in the former Yugoslavia). That said, these nations are both very military, and perhaps they consider it a proud moment to fight against a bigger bully than they are, even if they lose. Perhaps some people just need to remember that they can fight, regardless of whether they win or not.

I don't know if I want to drink to that, but that's what one drinks to when one celebrates this day.

Why Georgia Why?

E-mail is a strange thing. I grew up with computers and the internet. I first used it when I was ten years old, when a friend of mine had an old Prodigy account. I got my first e-mail address around my 14th birthday when I got a Suncoast FreeNet account. Alas, Suncoast FreeNet and all of the other FreeNets have gone way the way of the dodo--they offered text-based e-mail for free, but the demand for ever more visually intensive e-mails made their service obsolete (except to those people, like my parents, for whom comfort is not a concern, but price is).

A lot of us depend rather heavily on e-mail, for a variety of purposes. For example, I use e-mail as a relatively frequent form of communication, and use it to stay connected with my many friends and acquaintances who are far, far away. I use it for amusement, playing several games of Play-By-E-mail (PBEM for shot) Diplomacy. It should go without saying that I use e-mail frequently at work: I submit plans to some states (namely Georgia) using e-mail. I also receive almost all of the plans I review by e-mail and send back corrections by e-mail frequently as well (this is because I am most clear, and even personal, in the more impersonal forms of communication).

The state of Georgia, apparently, does not like me, at least by e-mail. A lot of the people I work with are in Georgia. Some of the readers of my blog are also in the state of Peaches and Pecans. However, when it comes to work e-mails, I have been unable to send or receive anything Georgian. This is obviously a problem.

What is the reason for the sudden cold shoulder from state that has been relatively nice to me in times past? The answer is unclear. At this point, my coworkers suspect that our server is on the fritz. Apparently Georgia is not the only state that our server does not like--it does not appear to like Indiana either. Apparently it likes Florida, though, as we continue to see the junk mail sent by the Ft. Lauderdale junk e-mail billionaire's club. Too bad they can't spell correctly and incorrectly assume a lot of things about me (and what I supposedly want or need in my life). Oh well. Our server does like North Carolina, which is nice, but I don't have to send any work e-mails there, so that is about as useful as sneakers for a snake.

Which is to say, it is not very useful at all.

The Waiter Rule

Apparently, many CEO's have an interesting test for determining the fitness of people for executive positions that would be useful in organizations across the board. The test is called "The Waiter Rule" and the rule is very simple--the character of people can be determined by how one treats waiters in a restaurant. Anyone can be nice to those who have power, but it is how we treat others who we can be seen as having some control over (for example, waiters are the most common types of "servants" most people deal with in their regular lives, though it would also apply to security guards, maids, and so forth).

As someone who frequently dines alone, I personally enjoy establishing a repoire with the waiters or waitresses at restaurants. Being a somewhat habitual person, I tend to eat at the same places often, so long as their food and service is consistent and decent. I've never been a waiter myself (the thought of my clumsiness being subjected to remarkable feats of balance with plates, glasses, and trays is a less than appealing thought), but I have a lot of friends and family who have been waitresses. Mostly, it seems as if the experience is generally poor.

I know that as a customer into a restaurant for the first time, generally as a young man with a somewhat intent and serious look on the face eating alone, many restaurant staffs tend to be somewhat skeptical. There are many times where my initial service has been somewhat indifferent, but I resolved to tip well anyway merely to prove a point. I am more interested in establishing rather friendly relations with waiters at restaurants, rather than pitilessly enforcing a just standard of renumeration. After all, I figure (generally correctly) that if waiters and waitresses do not have to fear that I will stiff them on tips, they will serve me very well. This has proven to be the case most of the time, as I can engage in somewhat witty banter about my favorite dishes on the menu, and why I order the same thing so often.

A friend of mine has an interesting rule when it comes to tips himself, and it is one well worth considering. Average service merits the regular 15% tip, good service merits 25%, and really good service gets a minimum tip of $3, regardless of the price of the meal. Personally, I think such rules of thought demonstrating generosity are a major positive incentive towards servers. In general, I consider positive reinforcements to be better than merely negative punishments. That is, however, another rather large subject for another time.

The point here, though, is that the way we treat waiters reveals a lot about ourselves. The Bible is very clear on this point (and the Passover season is a good time to reflect upon on it) as well, in agreement. God shows no partiality (that is, favorable treatment merely to those who are powerful), and neither should we. We should treat everyone with respect, honor, and consideration. This respect should not come from merely an egoism that looks for personal benefit, but from a mindframe than all human beings are worthy of dignity and kindness, and that station has no importance when it comes to human decency. This is the Bible's clear doctrine, as difficult as it may be to put into practice.

It is especially important (and difficult) to maintain this sort of friendliness and goodwill when mistakes happen, as they inevitably do. For example, the salad one orders at a restaurant one is visiting for the first time may have ingredients one does not like, or cannot eat (is that mango salsa?). Or there may be accidents, or the server may make mistakes. Occasionally, servers may be inattentive, distracted, or busy (it happens to the best of us sometimes), and the glass of sweet tea or root beer may run a little dry. How we handle difficult situations reveals a lot about our character. A wry comment or soft word can make things much easier for all around, even if soft words do not come easily for some of us.

So, how do you treat waiters? How many of you have been waiters before? Or are you, like me, merely a frequent patron of restaurants and a (hopefully) patient one? I would be interested in hearing what people have to say about the food service industry. With so many jobs in service right now (customer service would also fall under this rule as well), it is sad that such jobs are so difficult because of the rude behavior of others. Hopefully that cannot be said about any of us. After all, respect for the lowest of society is one of the most important signals of fitness for the highest reaches of society, both now and hereafter.

Thoughts For The Season

The Spring Holy Day season is upon us, and I have been too busy in my real life to make too many comments recently. That said, the theme of these festivals, of wholeness and oneness, is something I very much appreciate. My comments here are brief, but I hope they may be properly understood.

This past year has been a tough one, not only for myself, but for many of my friends as well, tougher than any year has been for a long while in my life at least. I suppose I could chalk it up to the so-called "quarter life crisis," though it seems to follow my "ten year rule" as well. At any rate, one must make the best of it. This entry, after all, is not merely about myself, but about others who have had a difficult year of it.

Passover, which was last night, is where we memorialize the sacrifice of Jesus Christ. Most of the time, our focus is on the sins that we have committed and how the death of Jesus Christ wiped those away. There are, however, other elements that may be particularly important (as they were for me, and no doubt many others, this year). Isaiah 53 is particularly salient on these other elements--including the fact that the sacrifice of Jesus Christ allows us to be restored to a loving relationship with our God and Father, as well as being healed by the wounds suffered by Christ. These are powerful words, but though familiar, they also resonate particularly strongly for myself (and, no doubt, for others). Certainly others long for the peace the chastisement of Christ brings, as difficult as that may be to fathom. Surely he has borne our griefs.

I look forward to the reflections on this season, both with regards to the Exodus, and to the Gospels. After all, this is a season about freedom and deliverance, and these things need to be reflected upon more. After all, there is much we need to be free from, and much to be thankful for, notwithstanding the difficulties we all face. So, here are my wishes, to my loyal readers, for a happy and worthwhile Spring Festival season, as well as a thought-provoking one.

A Brief Commentary on Matthew 18:1-7

Matthew 18 is an excellent guide to conflict resolution, but I would like to comment, briefly, on the first seven verses of this chapter. While there is much more I could say about these verses, particularly with regard to my own childhood, I will refrain, as enough people read this entry that I do not trust. Then again, as usual, I leave the clues to what is on my mind by what I choose to emphasize and remak upon. Those who have an ear, let them hear.

Matthew 18, the first seven verses, read the following way in the (updated) version of the 1560 Geneva New Testament: "The same time the disciples came unto Jesus saying, "Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?" And Jesus called a llittle child unto him, and set him in the midst of them, and said, "Verily I say unto you, except you be converted, and become as little children, you shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven. Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. And whosoever shall receive one such little child in my name, receive me. But whosoever shall offend one of these little ones which believe me, it were better for him, that a millsotone be hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea. Woe be unto the world because of offenses: for it must needs be that offences shall come, but woe be to that man by whom the offence come."

This passage begins, as could be expected, with the human desire for place and position. So it seems much begins in this world, in the struggle for place. The disciples, like any carnal human being, were very concerned about their rank and titles. At times Jesus Christ told them the benefits of their loyal service (ruling over the twelve tribes, dwelling places in the kingdom, blessings a hundredfold for the sacrifices of this life, etc.). However, here, he decides to take a slightly different tack. He shows them a little child and tells them that they will be to be like that (spiritually speaking) in order to enter the kingdom of God.

Much has been made about the humility of children as being the important feature of children, and no doubt that is true. Children are also innocent (though this can change if the conditions of verse six apply, as I will have place to comment on later). Children are teachable, and are highly sensitive to their environment. Too often as Christians we can become ensconced in our own little world, unable to see what is around us. This inhibits our ability to see when what happens around us changes, if we are stuck in a narrow-minded worldview that does not allow for external evidence. We as Christians must always be willing to learn, and must be sensitive to learning opportunities around us. They pop up in unexpected ways.

In the next verse the humility is specifically mentioned, and this part deserves mention as well. Humility is certainly required by us all. But we cannot forget to whom Jesus Christ was speaking. He was speaking to his inner circle. He was speaking through them to the rest of us, of course, but he was speaking to those who were his friends and direct subordinates, so to speak. No one is above the need to be humble--not the highest, nor the lowest. And though failure for the highest to properly set an example does not absolve others from obedience to God, those who lead will be punished much more harshly for setting the bad example, as verse six comments rather bluntly.

Next Jesus Christ comments about receiving children. Why is it so important to receive children, and how should we do so? Children are very natural, in that they say way they think, and they are rather open about what happens with them. They tell others their needs and wants (and confuse the two, of course) rather openly. They also are very honest about how others behave. We receive children as Christ in various ways. For one, we take their problems seriously. If we see that something wrong has happened to a child (and I can speak from rather serious personal experience here), we should take it seriously. We should not give them everything they want, but not to give them everything they need is beyond excuse. Our character is determined by how we treat those who are regarded the least, who can benefit us the least, and who have nothing to offer us besides (maybe) a quick and mumbled thanks. How we treat the least and smallest among us is how we will be judged.

It is at this point that Jesus Christ makes a rather sober comment, and one that has a great deal of resonance in my own personal life. The word offend here seems light. After all, I am (frequently) offended when people cut in front of me in traffic. That said, from the looks of the passage as a whole (and the verse in particular), it would appear that the reason why God takes offense towards children so seriously is that things done in childhood can deeply scar someone for a long, long time. Those who rob children of innocence or who make it difficult for them to trust others will suffer for it in the judgment, for God takes such matters rather seriously. To say too much more at this time and in this place would be ill advised, but the example used by Jesus Christ here is quite graphic. Being drowned at the bottom of the sea with one of the heaviest objects around (think of it like having an SUV tied around your neck and tossed to the bottom of the ocean) is a rather unpleasant fate. To reflect that the actual fate is worse is even less pleasant. Justice is not always a pretty thing.

Finally, the passage closes with a rather ominous verse, one that merits comments in several ways. For one, this seems to be Jesus Christ reflecting on his own upcoming betrayal, as the comment applies just a bit too perfectly to Judas Iscariot (the Gospel of Judas notwithstanding). Nonetheless, it has far more importance than this alone. God's plan involves suffering. Some of us must suffer more than others, in ways that are sometimes difficult to fathom, difficult to explain, and difficult to sort out. There is some higher plan involved, whether that is by design or by what God allows to happen, though both can be accounted, however difficult, as His will. Nonetheless, just beause God wills something does not absolve the human actors of their responsibility for our actions. Though the workings of free will and predestination are quite complicated, the Bible is pretty clear that God works His will through the free will of human beings.

Suffice it to say that much more could be said, but it is late, and I need to sleep this Sabbath morning. There are reasons why I study what I do, and why I focus on those things which I focus on. We all seek to explain our lives, to find some kind of meaning and purpose for what we go through, whether that is good or bad. Anything can be endured as long as it has a purpose and a meaning. So said Victor Frankl, and he was a wise man, who himself suffered much, as have we all, without a doubt.

Nigerian E-mail Scams

I get a large amount of junk e-mail, mostly from Church of God members with no gainful employment who desire to argue over such foolish things as how long our tassels have to be and other such nonsense. However, recently I have received a rather large number of more disturbing corresondence. Now, I have gotten these e-mails often before, but never in such a consistent pattern. Now, for the pleasure of my readership, I will post here unedited e-mails, before subjecting them to a brief and savage exegesis. You have been warned (joke).

Texts

ALIM KAREB.
AUDITIN AND ACCOUNTIN MANAGER,
BANK OF AFRICA (B.O.A)
OUAGADOUGOU-BURKINA FASO.


Dear Friend,

I am the AOUDITING AND ACCOUNTING MANAGER BANK OF AFRICA (B.O.A) here
in
Ouagadougou, Burkina Faso. In my department we discovered an abandoned
sum of US$14m dollars (FOURTEEN MILLION US DOLLARS) in an account that
belongs to one of our foreign customer (MR. ANDREAS SCHRANNER from
Munich,
Germany) who died along with his entire family in Jully 2000 in a plane
crash.
FOR MORE INFORMATION VISIT THIS SITE BELLOW

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/859479.stm

Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his
next of kin to come over and claim his money because we cannot release
it
unless some body applies for it as next of kin or relation to the
deceased
as
indicated in our banking guidlings and laws but unfortunately we learnt
that all his supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him
at the
plane crash leaving nobody behind for the claim.

It is therefore upon this discovery that I now decided to make this
business proposal to you and release the money to you as the next of
kin or
relation to the deceased for safety and subsequent disbursement since
nobody
is
coming for it and we don't want this money to go into the bank treasury
as unclaimed bill.

The banking law and guidline here stipulates that if such money
remained unclaimed after six years, the money will be transfered into
the
bank
treasury as unclaimed fund. The request of foreigner as next of kin in
this business is occassioned by the fact that the customer was a
foreigner
and a Burkinabe cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner.
I agree that 30% of this money will be for you as a respect to the
provision of a foriegn account , 10% will be set aside for expenses
incurred
during the business and 60% would be for me Thereafter, I will visit
your
country for disbursement according to the percentage indicated
Therefore, to
enable the immediate transfer of this fund to you arranged,you must
apply
first to the bank as relation or next of kin of the deceased indicating
your
bank name, your bank account number, your private telephone and fax
number
for easy and effective communication and location where in the money
will
be remitted.

Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or email the text
of the application .

I will not fail to bring to your notice this transaction is hitch-free
and
that you should not entertain any atom of fear as all required
arrangements
have been made for the transfer.

You should contact me immediately as soon as you receive this letter.

Trusting to hear from you immediately.
Yours Faithfully,
Dr.ALIM KAREB. (B.O.A)
TREAT AS URGENT AND CONFIDENCIAL

MR ALIM KAREB.
AUDITIN AND ACCOUNTIN MANAGER,
BANK OF AFRICA (B.O.A)
OUAGADOUGOU-BURKINA FASO.


Dear Friend,

I am the AOUDITING AND ACCOUNTING MANAGER BANK OF AFRICA (B.O.A) here
in
Ouagadougou, Burkina Faso. In my department we discovered an abandoned
sum of US$14m dollars (FOURTEEN MILLION US DOLLARS) in an account that
belongs to one of our foreign customer (MR. ANDREAS SCHRANNER from
Munich,
Germany) who died along with his entire family in Jully 2000 in a plane
crash.
FOR MORE INFORMATION VISIT THIS SITE BELLOW

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/859479.stm

Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his
next of kin to come over and claim his money because we cannot release
it
unless some body applies for it as next of kin or relation to the
deceased
as
indicated in our banking guidlings and laws but unfortunately we learnt
that all his supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him
at the
plane crash leaving nobody behind for the claim.

It is therefore upon this discovery that I now decided to make this
business proposal to you and release the money to you as the next of
kin or
relation to the deceased for safety and subsequent disbursement since
nobody
is
coming for it and we don't want this money to go into the bank treasury
as unclaimed bill.

The banking law and guidline here stipulates that if such money
remained unclaimed after six years, the money will be transfered into
the
bank
treasury as unclaimed fund. The request of foreigner as next of kin in
this business is occassioned by the fact that the customer was a
foreigner
and a Burkinabe cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner.
I agree that 30% of this money will be for you as a respect to the
provision of a foriegn account , 10% will be set aside for expenses
incurred
during the business and 60% would be for me Thereafter, I will visit
your
country for disbursement according to the percentage indicated
Therefore, to
enable the immediate transfer of this fund to you arranged,you must
apply
first to the bank as relation or next of kin of the deceased indicating
your
bank name, your bank account number, your private telephone and fax
number
for easy and effective communication and location where in the money
will
be remitted.

Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or email the text
of the application .

I will not fail to bring to your notice this transaction is hitch-free
and
that you should not entertain any atom of fear as all required
arrangements
have been made for the transfer.

You should contact me immediately as soon as you receive this letter.

Trusting to hear from you immediately.
Yours Faithfully,
Dr.ALIM KAREB. (B.O.A)
TREAT AS URGENT AND CONFIDENCIAL

Brief editorial comments: Two letters for the price of one! In the first he is a Mister, and in the second he has been upgraded to a Doctor. Most impressive!

FROM;MR.LUCAS KRUIS
JOHANNESBURG SOUTH AFRICA
E-MAIL:lucaskruis@hotmail.com
TEL;27-73-232-1447

REQUEST FOR URGENT ASSISTANCE/BUSINESS

Dear,

With due respect, trust and humanity, I write this letter to you
seeking
your help and assistance though Its difficult since we have not met
before.
I got your good contact from the South African Information Exchange
(SAIE)
regarding your business profile and sincerity. I believe that you are
capable and reliable in handling this urgent international transaction
of
this sort.
I am lucas kruis, the son of the Comrade Border kruis the Zimbabwean
former
Minister for Youth & Gender Equality who is also a businessman and
politician, in the Zimbabwean political arena . My father was the
famous
politician who stood firm against President Mugabes idea of continuous
fight
in Democratic Republic of Congo and my father also stood against the
seizure
of white owned farms and the distribution of it to the blacks without
compesation to the white owners. Because of my fathers sincerity he was
killed on 14th April 2001 by a planned motor accident along Mashonaland
in
Western Mashona Province of Zimbabwe, the planners of the accident is
to be
said dissidents soldiers suspected to have the backing of the
Government and
President Mugabe himself.

Sir, when this accident occurred at about 10:15 am Zimbabwean time my
father
did not died on the spot rather he was rushed to Harare hospital by
unknown
soldiers and my father managed to call my younger brother and me
through his
assistance, and when my brother and I rushed to the hospital my father
only
managed to sneak a written message to us, explaining his condition
concerning one diplomatic box he concealed under the roof of his
private
bedroom containing US$25 Million (Twenty Five Million United States
Dollars)
and other vital documents which was meant for his political campaign in
the
next election June 2002. He instructed me to take my brother and my
younger
sister with the box and leave Zimbabwe immediately for our safety,
which we
have successfully did and now we are in South Africa with the money
deposited in a Private Security Company with the original documents of
deposit intact.
But because of the countrys exixsting law which bars asyllum seekers /
refugees like us to operate an account that exceed US$2,000.00 and the
fear
of money not raising eyebrows here in South Africa, I decided to write
to
you to seek for your help for this money to be transferred into your
private
bank account as all arrangements for a hitch-free transfer have been
fully
taken care of. I want to assure you also that this transaction is 100%
risk
free as no other person knows about this box apart from my younger
brother
and i.

Sir, as for your reward for your kind assistance we have resolved to
give
you 20% of the total amount, 10% for any expenses that might be
incurred in
the course of this transaction. We planned to invest the rest of the
money
in your country under your guidance . If you are willing to help us try
as
much as possible to reach me with the above numbers to enable us
proceed in
earnest towards concluding all transaction.

Sir, bear it in mind that our lives solely depend on this fund and we
do
hope that this money will be safe when finally transferred into your
account. I do hope of establishing a rewarding and good relationship
with
you and your family after this transaction. Hoping to hear from you as
soon
as possible. Thank you for your co-operation and God bless
Best regards
LUCAS KRUIS. FROM;MR.LUCAS KRUIS
JOHANNESBURG SOUTH AFRICA
E-MAIL:lucaskruis@hotmail.com
TEL;27-73-232-1447

REQUEST FOR URGENT ASSISTANCE/BUSINESS

Dear,

With due respect, trust and humanity, I write this letter to you
seeking
your help and assistance though Its difficult since we have not met
before.
I got your good contact from the South African Information Exchange
(SAIE)
regarding your business profile and sincerity. I believe that you are
capable and reliable in handling this urgent international transaction
of
this sort.
I am lucas kruis, the son of the Comrade Border kruis the Zimbabwean
former
Minister for Youth & Gender Equality who is also a businessman and
politician, in the Zimbabwean political arena . My father was the
famous
politician who stood firm against President Mugabes idea of continuous
fight
in Democratic Republic of Congo and my father also stood against the
seizure
of white owned farms and the distribution of it to the blacks without
compesation to the white owners. Because of my fathers sincerity he was
killed on 14th April 2001 by a planned motor accident along Mashonaland
in
Western Mashona Province of Zimbabwe, the planners of the accident is
to be
said dissidents soldiers suspected to have the backing of the
Government and
President Mugabe himself.

Sir, when this accident occurred at about 10:15 am Zimbabwean time my
father
did not died on the spot rather he was rushed to Harare hospital by
unknown
soldiers and my father managed to call my younger brother and me
through his
assistance, and when my brother and I rushed to the hospital my father
only
managed to sneak a written message to us, explaining his condition
concerning one diplomatic box he concealed under the roof of his
private
bedroom containing US$25 Million (Twenty Five Million United States
Dollars)
and other vital documents which was meant for his political campaign in
the
next election June 2002. He instructed me to take my brother and my
younger
sister with the box and leave Zimbabwe immediately for our safety,
which we
have successfully did and now we are in South Africa with the money
deposited in a Private Security Company with the original documents of
deposit intact.
But because of the countrys exixsting law which bars asyllum seekers /
refugees like us to operate an account that exceed US$2,000.00 and the
fear
of money not raising eyebrows here in South Africa, I decided to write
to
you to seek for your help for this money to be transferred into your
private
bank account as all arrangements for a hitch-free transfer have been
fully
taken care of. I want to assure you also that this transaction is 100%
risk
free as no other person knows about this box apart from my younger
brother
and i.

Sir, as for your reward for your kind assistance we have resolved to
give
you 20% of the total amount, 10% for any expenses that might be
incurred in
the course of this transaction. We planned to invest the rest of the
money
in your country under your guidance . If you are willing to help us try
as
much as possible to reach me with the above numbers to enable us
proceed in
earnest towards concluding all transaction.

Sir, bear it in mind that our lives solely depend on this fund and we
do
hope that this money will be safe when finally transferred into your
account. I do hope of establishing a rewarding and good relationship
with
you and your family after this transaction. Hoping to hear from you as
soon
as possible. Thank you for your co-operation and God bless
Best regards
LUCAS KRUIS.

Brief editorial comments: Our lives solely depend on this fund? Unlikely.

From The Desk of MUSA SULE
Bill and Exchange Officer
Foreigner Remittance Dept
African Development Bank
Burkina Faso

Dear Friend,
I am the officer of bill and exchange at the foreign remittance
department
of African development bank.

In my department i discovered an abandoned sum ofUS$10.5 US dollars
(ten
million five hundred thousand US dollars) in an account that belongs to
one
of our foreign customer who died along with his entire family in July
2001
plane crash.
website: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/859479.stm

Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his
next
ofkin to come over and claim his money because we cannot release it
unlesssome body applies for it as next of kin or relation to the
deceased as
indicated in our banking guidlings and laws but unfortunately we learnt
that
all his supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him at
theplane
crash leaving nobody behind for the claim.

It is therefore upon this discovery that I decided to make this
business
proposal to you and release the money to you as the next of kin or
relation
to the deceased for safety andsubsequent disbursement since nobody is
coming
for it and we don't want this money to go into the bank treasury as
unclaimed bill.

The banking law and guidline here stipulates that if such money
remained
unclaimed after five years, the money will be transfered into the bank
treasury as unclaimed fund. The request of foreigner as next of kin in
this
business is occassioned by the fact that the customer was a foreigner
and
aBurkinabe cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner.
I agree that 30% of this money will be for you as a respect to the
provision
of a foriegn account , 10%will be set aside for expenses incurred
during the
business .
Thereafter, I will visit your country for disbursement according to
the
percentage indicated.

Therefore, to enable the immediate transfer of thisfund to you as
arranged,
you must apply first to the bank as relation or nextof kin of the
deceased
indicating your bank name, your bank account number,your private
telephone
and fax number for easy and effective communicationand location where
in the
money will be remitted.

Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or email the text
ofthe application . I will not fail to bring to your notice that
thistransaction is hitch-free and that you should not entertain any
atom of
fearas all required arrangements have been made for the transfer.You
should
contact me immediately as soon as youreceive this letter.
Trusting to hear from you immediately.

Yours faithfully
MR MUSA SULE
Bill and Exchange officer





From The Desk of MUSA SULE
Bill and Exchange Officer
Foreigner Remittance Dept
African Development Bank
Burkina Faso

Dear Friend,
I am the officer of bill and exchange at the foreign remittance
department
of African development bank.

In my department i discovered an abandoned sum ofUS$10.5 US dollars
(ten
million five hundred thousand US dollars) in an account that belongs to
one
of our foreign customer who died along with his entire family in July
2001
plane crash.
website: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/859479.stm

Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his
next
ofkin to come over and claim his money because we cannot release it
unlesssome body applies for it as next of kin or relation to the
deceased as
indicated in our banking guidlings and laws but unfortunately we learnt
that
all his supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him at
theplane
crash leaving nobody behind for the claim.

It is therefore upon this discovery that I decided to make this
business
proposal to you and release the money to you as the next of kin or
relation
to the deceased for safety andsubsequent disbursement since nobody is
coming
for it and we don't want this money to go into the bank treasury as
unclaimed bill.

The banking law and guidline here stipulates that if such money
remained
unclaimed after five years, the money will be transfered into the bank
treasury as unclaimed fund. The request of foreigner as next of kin in
this
business is occassioned by the fact that the customer was a foreigner
and
aBurkinabe cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner.
I agree that 30% of this money will be for you as a respect to the
provision
of a foriegn account , 10%will be set aside for expenses incurred
during the
business .
Thereafter, I will visit your country for disbursement according to
the
percentage indicated.

Therefore, to enable the immediate transfer of thisfund to you as
arranged,
you must apply first to the bank as relation or nextof kin of the
deceased
indicating your bank name, your bank account number,your private
telephone
and fax number for easy and effective communicationand location where
in the
money will be remitted.

Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or email the text
ofthe application . I will not fail to bring to your notice that
thistransaction is hitch-free and that you should not entertain any
atom of
fearas all required arrangements have been made for the transfer.You
should
contact me immediately as soon as youreceive this letter.
Trusting to hear from you immediately.

Yours faithfully
MR MUSA SULE
Bill and Exchange officer





From The Desk of MUSA SULE
Bill and Exchange Officer
Foreigner Remittance Dept
African Development Bank
Burkina Faso

Dear Friend,
I am the officer of bill and exchange at the foreign remittance
department
of African development bank.

In my department i discovered an abandoned sum ofUS$10.5 US dollars
(ten
million five hundred thousand US dollars) in an account that belongs to
one
of our foreign customer who died along with his entire family in July
2001
plane crash.
website: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/859479.stm

Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his
next
ofkin to come over and claim his money because we cannot release it
unlesssome body applies for it as next of kin or relation to the
deceased as
indicated in our banking guidlings and laws but unfortunately we learnt
that
all his supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him at
theplane
crash leaving nobody behind for the claim.

It is therefore upon this discovery that I decided to make this
business
proposal to you and release the money to you as the next of kin or
relation
to the deceased for safety andsubsequent disbursement since nobody is
coming
for it and we don't want this money to go into the bank treasury as
unclaimed bill.

The banking law and guidline here stipulates that if such money
remained
unclaimed after five years, the money will be transfered into the bank
treasury as unclaimed fund. The request of foreigner as next of kin in
this
business is occassioned by the fact that the customer was a foreigner
and
aBurkinabe cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner.
I agree that 30% of this money will be for you as a respect to the
provision
of a foriegn account , 10%will be set aside for expenses incurred
during the
business .
Thereafter, I will visit your country for disbursement according to
the
percentage indicated.

Therefore, to enable the immediate transfer of thisfund to you as
arranged,
you must apply first to the bank as relation or nextof kin of the
deceased
indicating your bank name, your bank account number,your private
telephone
and fax number for easy and effective communicationand location where
in the
money will be remitted.

Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or email the text
ofthe application . I will not fail to bring to your notice that
thistransaction is hitch-free and that you should not entertain any
atom of
fearas all required arrangements have been made for the transfer.You
should
contact me immediately as soon as youreceive this letter.
Trusting to hear from you immediately.

Yours faithfully
MR MUSA SULE
Bill and Exchange officer





From The Desk of MUSA SULE
Bill and Exchange Officer
Foreigner Remittance Dept
African Development Bank
Burkina Faso

Dear Friend,
I am the officer of bill and exchange at the foreign remittance
department
of African development bank.

In my department i discovered an abandoned sum ofUS$10.5 US dollars
(ten
million five hundred thousand US dollars) in an account that belongs to
one
of our foreign customer who died along with his entire family in July
2001
plane crash.
website: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/859479.stm

Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his
next
ofkin to come over and claim his money because we cannot release it
unlesssome body applies for it as next of kin or relation to the
deceased as
indicated in our banking guidlings and laws but unfortunately we learnt
that
all his supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him at
theplane
crash leaving nobody behind for the claim.

It is therefore upon this discovery that I decided to make this
business
proposal to you and release the money to you as the next of kin or
relation
to the deceased for safety andsubsequent disbursement since nobody is
coming
for it and we don't want this money to go into the bank treasury as
unclaimed bill.

The banking law and guidline here stipulates that if such money
remained
unclaimed after five years, the money will be transfered into the bank
treasury as unclaimed fund. The request of foreigner as next of kin in
this
business is occassioned by the fact that the customer was a foreigner
and
aBurkinabe cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner.
I agree that 30% of this money will be for you as a respect to the
provision
of a foriegn account , 10%will be set aside for expenses incurred
during the
business .
Thereafter, I will visit your country for disbursement according to
the
percentage indicated.

Therefore, to enable the immediate transfer of thisfund to you as
arranged,
you must apply first to the bank as relation or nextof kin of the
deceased
indicating your bank name, your bank account number,your private
telephone
and fax number for easy and effective communicationand location where
in the
money will be remitted.

Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or email the text
ofthe application . I will not fail to bring to your notice that
thistransaction is hitch-free and that you should not entertain any
atom of
fearas all required arrangements have been made for the transfer.You
should
contact me immediately as soon as youreceive this letter.
Trusting to hear from you immediately.

Yours faithfully
MR MUSA SULE
Bill and Exchange officer





From The Desk of MUSA SULE
Bill and Exchange Officer
Foreigner Remittance Dept
African Development Bank
Burkina Faso

Dear Friend,
I am the officer of bill and exchange at the foreign remittance
department
of African development bank.

In my department i discovered an abandoned sum ofUS$10.5 US dollars
(ten
million five hundred thousand US dollars) in an account that belongs to
one
of our foreign customer who died along with his entire family in July
2001
plane crash.
website: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/859479.stm

Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his
next
ofkin to come over and claim his money because we cannot release it
unlesssome body applies for it as next of kin or relation to the
deceased as
indicated in our banking guidlings and laws but unfortunately we learnt
that
all his supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him at
theplane
crash leaving nobody behind for the claim.

It is therefore upon this discovery that I decided to make this
business
proposal to you and release the money to you as the next of kin or
relation
to the deceased for safety andsubsequent disbursement since nobody is
coming
for it and we don't want this money to go into the bank treasury as
unclaimed bill.

The banking law and guidline here stipulates that if such money
remained
unclaimed after five years, the money will be transfered into the bank
treasury as unclaimed fund. The request of foreigner as next of kin in
this
business is occassioned by the fact that the customer was a foreigner
and
aBurkinabe cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner.
I agree that 30% of this money will be for you as a respect to the
provision
of a foriegn account , 10%will be set aside for expenses incurred
during the
business .
Thereafter, I will visit your country for disbursement according to
the
percentage indicated.

Therefore, to enable the immediate transfer of thisfund to you as
arranged,
you must apply first to the bank as relation or nextof kin of the
deceased
indicating your bank name, your bank account number,your private
telephone
and fax number for easy and effective communicationand location where
in the
money will be remitted.

Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or email the text
ofthe application . I will not fail to bring to your notice that
thistransaction is hitch-free and that you should not entertain any
atom of
fearas all required arrangements have been made for the transfer.You
should
contact me immediately as soon as youreceive this letter.
Trusting to hear from you immediately.

Yours faithfully
MR MUSA SULE
Bill and Exchange officer





From The Desk of MUSA SULE
Bill and Exchange Officer
Foreigner Remittance Dept
African Development Bank
Burkina Faso

Dear Friend,
I am the officer of bill and exchange at the foreign remittance
department
of African development bank.

In my department i discovered an abandoned sum ofUS$10.5 US dollars
(ten
million five hundred thousand US dollars) in an account that belongs to
one
of our foreign customer who died along with his entire family in July
2001
plane crash.
website: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/859479.stm

Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his
next
ofkin to come over and claim his money because we cannot release it
unlesssome body applies for it as next of kin or relation to the
deceased as
indicated in our banking guidlings and laws but unfortunately we learnt
that
all his supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him at
theplane
crash leaving nobody behind for the claim.

It is therefore upon this discovery that I decided to make this
business
proposal to you and release the money to you as the next of kin or
relation
to the deceased for safety andsubsequent disbursement since nobody is
coming
for it and we don't want this money to go into the bank treasury as
unclaimed bill.

The banking law and guidline here stipulates that if such money
remained
unclaimed after five years, the money will be transfered into the bank
treasury as unclaimed fund. The request of foreigner as next of kin in
this
business is occassioned by the fact that the customer was a foreigner
and
aBurkinabe cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner.
I agree that 30% of this money will be for you as a respect to the
provision
of a foriegn account , 10%will be set aside for expenses incurred
during the
business .
Thereafter, I will visit your country for disbursement according to
the
percentage indicated.

Therefore, to enable the immediate transfer of thisfund to you as
arranged,
you must apply first to the bank as relation or nextof kin of the
deceased
indicating your bank name, your bank account number,your private
telephone
and fax number for easy and effective communicationand location where
in the
money will be remitted.

Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or email the text
ofthe application . I will not fail to bring to your notice that
thistransaction is hitch-free and that you should not entertain any
atom of
fearas all required arrangements have been made for the transfer.You
should
contact me immediately as soon as youreceive this letter.
Trusting to hear from you immediately.

Yours faithfully
MR MUSA SULE
Bill and Exchange officer

Brief editorial comments: You'd think if someone wanted to swindle my money, they'd be smart enough not to send me the same message five times.

International remittance Dept,
Global Bank Nig. Plc,
Corporate Office,
136 Adeola Odeku road,
Victoria Island,
Lagos - Nigeria.
24-03-06

Hello,

I am Dr. JOE IFEANYI a banker, staff in the office of the director
international remittance department, Global Bank of Nigeria Plc,
Lagos-Nigeria. I have urgent and very confidential business proposition for
you.On June 2001, an American Oil
consultant/contractor with the Nigerian National Petroleum
Corporation,engr. ROY ALLEN made a numbered time (Fixed) Deposit for twelve
calendar months, valued at US$17,000,000.00(seventeen million Dollars ) in my
branch.Upon maturity,I sent a routine notification to his forwarding
address but got no reply.

After a month,we sent a reminder and finally we discovered from his
contract employers, the Nigerian National Petroleum Corporation that Engr.
Roy died from an automobile accident with his wife and three
children.On further investigation,I found out that he died without making a WILL,
and all attempts to trace his next of kin was fruitless I therefore
made further investigation and discovered that He did not declare any kin
or relations in all his official documents, including his Bank Deposit
paperwork in my Bank. This sum of US$17,000,000.00 is still sitting in
my Bank and the interest is being rolled over with the principal sum at
the end of each year. No one will ever come forward to claim it.
According to Nigerian Law, at the expiration of 5(five) years, the
money will revert to the ownership of the Nigerian Government if nobody
applies to claim the fund.Consequently, my proposal is that I will like
you as a foreigner to stand in as the next of kin to him so that the
fruits of this old man's labour will not get into the hands of some corrupt
government officials.

This is simple, I will like you to provide immediately your full name
and address so that the Attorney will prepare the necessary documents
and affidavits which will put you in place as the next of kin, your
direct phone number for easy communication.
The money will be paid into your account for us to share in the ratio
of 50% for me and 45% for you and 5% for any expenses incured on the
process of the transaction including taxes, .There is no risk at all as
all the paperwork for this transaction will be done by the attorney and
my position with the bank guarantees the successful execution of this
transaction.If you are interested, please send the informations to me.

Upon your response, I shall then send to you an application which you
will fill and forward to the bank requesting the release of the fund to
you.Please observe utmost confidentiality, and be rest assured that
this transaction would be most profitable for both of us as I will need
your advice in the area of investment in your country. My cell #
234-8028286924
Altern. email: dr_joe01@zipmail.com.br

Best regards,
Dr. Joe

Brief editorial comments: What's up with these doctors?

FROM THE DESK OF MR AMINU VATA.
BILL AND EXCHANGE MANAGER,
BANK OF AFRICA (B.O.A).
OUAGADOUGOU, BURKINA FASO
WEST AFRICA.

Dear Friend,

I am the manager of bill and exchange department BANK OF AFRICA
(B.O.A) In
my department we discovered an abandoned sum of $15m US dollars (
fifteen
million US dollars) . In an account that belongs to one of our foreign
customer who died along with his entire family in november 1998 in a
plane
crash.

Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his
next of
kin to come over and claim his money because we cannot release it
unless
somebody applies for it as next of kin or relation to the deceased as
indicated in our banking guidelines but unfortunately we learnt that
all his
supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him at the plane
crash
leaving nobody behind for the claim.

It is therefore upon this discovery that I and other officials in my
department now decided to make this businness proposal to you and
release
the money to you as the next of kin or relation to the deceased for
safety
and subsequent disbursement since nobody is coming for it and we donÃÕ
want
this money to go into the Bank treasury as unclaimed Bill.

The Banking law and guideline here stipulates that if such money
remained
unclamed after five years, the money will be transfered into the Bank
treasury as unclaimed fund. The request of foreigner as next of kin in
this
business is occasioned by the fact that the customer was a foreigner
and a
Burkinabe cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner. We agree that 30
% of
this money will be for you as foreign partner, in respect to the
provision
of a foreign account, 10 % will be set aside for expenses incured
during the
business and 60 % would be for me and my colleagues.

Then after I and my colleagues will visit your country for disbursement
accoding to the percentages indicated. Therefore to enable the
immediate
trnansfer of this fund to you as arranged, you must apply first to the
bank
as relations or next of kin of the deceased indicating your bank name,
your
bank account number, your private telephone and fax number for easy and
effective communication and location where in the money will be
remitted .
Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or email the text
of
the application.

I will not fail to bring to your notice that this transaction is hitch
free
and that you should not entertain any atom of fear as all required
arrangements have been made for the transfer . you should contact me
immediately as soon as you receive this letter. Trusting to hear from
you
immediately. PLEASE MY DEAR FRIEND THIS IS MY PRIVATE LINE YOU CAN
CALL
ME IMMIDEATELY YOU RECEIVE THIS MAIL. 00226 (76 63 87 21)

THANKS
MR AMINU VATA.
B.O.A (BANK OF AFRICA)

Brief editorial comments: My dear friend? Who are you again? Probably some Nigerian dude in a cyber cafe.

FROM:MRS.THANDI MPOYO
TEL:27 7322 91 403
EAIL;THANDI_MPOYO5@HOTMAIL.COM
ATTN: DIRECTOR/C.E.O,

I am the wife of Late Mr. Daniel Mpoyo a farmer from Zimbabwe. I got
your
address from South African Information Exchange in Johannesburg. During
the
current war against the farmers in Zimbabwe from the supports of our
President Robert Mugabe to claim all the white-owned farms to his party
members and his followers, he ordered all the white-owned farmers to
surrender all their farm lands to his party members and his followers.

My husband was one of the best farmers in our country and also in
partnership with white farmers. He did not support the Idea of our
President
against the white farmers,supporters of President Mugabe invaded my
husband's farm and burnt everything in the Farm Lands, killing my
husband
and made away with a lot of items in our Farm Lands.After the death of
my
husband,my son and his family decided to move out from Zimbabwe but i
am
still in our country due to my health situation thou my life is in
danger,i
strongly believe God to be with me and my family and to safe money my
husband kept in my care for our future investment overseas. The amount
is
US $ 9.Million(Nine Million United States Dollars)and my son decided to
move
to the Republic of South Africa with his family where he deposited the
money
in a Security Company as valuables. So, we decided to contact overseas
Firm
that will assist us move this money out of South Africa.We have agreed
to
give you from the total sum 20% for helping us to move this money to
your
country and 5%:will be mapped out for expenses both of us might incured
during this transaction while the balance will be for my family to
invest
in your country.

Kindly furnish me with all your banking details and your personal phone
and
fax numbers for easy communication. You can contact my son Mr.Johnson
Mpoyo
on the above telephone numbers for further information.Note that this
transaction is 100% risk-free and it requires mutual trust and absolute
confidentiality and my son have taken care of all formalities regarding
this
transaction. Your urgent response will be highly appreciated in this
regard.Thanks and God bless.

Best regards,
MRS.THANDI MPOYO
TEL ;27 7322 91 403
FROM:MRS.THANDI MPOYO
TEL:27 7322 91 403
EAIL;THANDI_MPOYO5@HOTMAIL.COM
ATTN: DIRECTOR/C.E.O,

I am the wife of Late Mr. Daniel Mpoyo a farmer from Zimbabwe. I got
your
address from South African Information Exchange in Johannesburg. During
the
current war against the farmers in Zimbabwe from the supports of our
President Robert Mugabe to claim all the white-owned farms to his party
members and his followers, he ordered all the white-owned farmers to
surrender all their farm lands to his party members and his followers.

My husband was one of the best farmers in our country and also in
partnership with white farmers. He did not support the Idea of our
President
against the white farmers,supporters of President Mugabe invaded my
husband's farm and burnt everything in the Farm Lands, killing my
husband
and made away with a lot of items in our Farm Lands.After the death of
my
husband,my son and his family decided to move out from Zimbabwe but i
am
still in our country due to my health situation thou my life is in
danger,i
strongly believe God to be with me and my family and to safe money my
husband kept in my care for our future investment overseas. The amount
is
US $ 9.Million(Nine Million United States Dollars)and my son decided to
move
to the Republic of South Africa with his family where he deposited the
money
in a Security Company as valuables. So, we decided to contact overseas
Firm
that will assist us move this money out of South Africa.We have agreed
to
give you from the total sum 20% for helping us to move this money to
your
country and 5%:will be mapped out for expenses both of us might incured
during this transaction while the balance will be for my family to
invest
in your country.

Kindly furnish me with all your banking details and your personal phone
and
fax numbers for easy communication. You can contact my son Mr.Johnson
Mpoyo
on the above telephone numbers for further information.Note that this
transaction is 100% risk-free and it requires mutual trust and absolute
confidentiality and my son have taken care of all formalities regarding
this
transaction. Your urgent response will be highly appreciated in this
regard.Thanks and God bless.

Best regards,
MRS.THANDI MPOYO
TEL ;27 7322 91 403
FROM:MRS.THANDI MPOYO
TEL:27 7322 91 403
EAIL;THANDI_MPOYO5@HOTMAIL.COM
ATTN: DIRECTOR/C.E.O,

I am the wife of Late Mr. Daniel Mpoyo a farmer from Zimbabwe. I got
your
address from South African Information Exchange in Johannesburg. During
the
current war against the farmers in Zimbabwe from the supports of our
President Robert Mugabe to claim all the white-owned farms to his party
members and his followers, he ordered all the white-owned farmers to
surrender all their farm lands to his party members and his followers.

My husband was one of the best farmers in our country and also in
partnership with white farmers. He did not support the Idea of our
President
against the white farmers,supporters of President Mugabe invaded my
husband's farm and burnt everything in the Farm Lands, killing my
husband
and made away with a lot of items in our Farm Lands.After the death of
my
husband,my son and his family decided to move out from Zimbabwe but i
am
still in our country due to my health situation thou my life is in
danger,i
strongly believe God to be with me and my family and to safe money my
husband kept in my care for our future investment overseas. The amount
is
US $ 9.Million(Nine Million United States Dollars)and my son decided to
move
to the Republic of South Africa with his family where he deposited the
money
in a Security Company as valuables. So, we decided to contact overseas
Firm
that will assist us move this money out of South Africa.We have agreed
to
give you from the total sum 20% for helping us to move this money to
your
country and 5%:will be mapped out for expenses both of us might incured
during this transaction while the balance will be for my family to
invest
in your country.

Kindly furnish me with all your banking details and your personal phone
and
fax numbers for easy communication. You can contact my son Mr.Johnson
Mpoyo
on the above telephone numbers for further information.Note that this
transaction is 100% risk-free and it requires mutual trust and absolute
confidentiality and my son have taken care of all formalities regarding
this
transaction. Your urgent response will be highly appreciated in this
regard.Thanks and God bless.

Best regards,
MRS.THANDI MPOYO
TEL ;27 7322 91 403

Brief editorial comments: I'm not messing with any farmers from Zimbabwe. I have an acquaintance who is actually a high ranking judge in Zimbabwe, actually, and even if something like this were real (which I highly doubt, it probably comes from the corrupt ruling party there trying to make some $$$), I'd avoid it like the plague.

FROM:MRS.CAROLINE ZUMA.
6B RIVONIA ROAD.
FROM SOUTH AFRICA.
caro_line_bc@hotmail.com


ATT:CEO.
PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL
You may be surprised to receive this letter since you don't know me, I
am
Mrs.CAROLINE ZUMA, the wife of late Dr. J .ZUMA, who was cently
murdered
inthe land dispute in Zimbabwe.

I got your contact through South African Information exchange (S.A.I.E)
here
in Johannesburg and I decided to write for an assistance. My late
husband
was among the few blacks Zimbabwe rich farmers murdered in cold blood
by
the agents of the ruling government of President Robert Mugabe for his
alleged support and sympathy of the Zimbabwean opposition party
controlled
by the ites.

Before his death, he took I and my son JACK to Johannesburg to deposit
the
sum of US$21.5 Million (TWENTY ONE MILLION FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND United
states Dollars)in JACK" name as the beneficiary with a private Security
and
Finance Company as if he foresaw the looming danger in Zimbabwe. The
money
was deposited as a consignment in a box to the security company to
avoid
seizure, and to avoid much demurrage from the security company, This
money
was for the purchase of new machines for the farm and establishment of
a new
farm in swasiland.

This land problem arose when President Robert Mugabe introduce a new
land
act which wholly effects the rich white farmers and some blacks
vehemently
condemned the modus operadi adopted by the government that resulted to
rampant killings and mob actin by the war veterans and some political
thugs,
preciselym more than sixty one (61) people have been killed. Heads of
government from Western World especially Britain and United States of
America have voice their condemnation of Mugabe's plans.

Subsequently, the South African development community (SADC) has ously
supported Mugabe's new land reform act. It is against this background
that
I and my family who are currently staying in south Africa have decided
to
transfer my husband's money into a foreign account.please, if you are
willing to help me,I and my son have agreed to give you 20% while 75%
As the
only wife to my late husband 5% will be for the expenses during this
transaction.

I am saddled with the responsibility of seeking for an account where
this
money could be transferred without the knowledge of my government who
had
tactically freezing our family wealth and South African Government
seems to
be playing alongside with them.

We have decided not to invest this amount of money in South Africa for
the
fear of seizure and tering the same experience in future since both
countries have almost the same political history.

More so the South African Foreign Exchange policy does not allow such
investment hence we are asyllum seekers,I must let you know that this
transaction is 100% risk free. Therefore if you accept this
proposal,please
contact my son JACK ZUMA who is the beneficiary with his email address:
jackzuma177@yahoo.com or call with the telephone number +
27-723-917-777

Please do send an email , but you should know that this is highly
conffidential and shall be kept within you alone. Have a good day.
Best regards,
MRS.CAROLINE ZUMA.
{FOR THE FAMILY}

Brief editorial comments: Whose family is this for? Certainly not mine.

Dear Good Friend.

I greet you in the name of the Lord.

I am Mrs.Alies Adams from Solomon Islands. I am married to Mr.Adams who
worked with our Embassy in Ivory Coast for nine years before he diedon
the 15th August 2004. We were married for eleven years without a child.
He died after a brief illness that lasted for only four days.

Ever before his death we were both born again Christians and have sown
into many ministries. Since his death I decided not to remarry, but
feeling quite lonely if not the Lord who has been my partner and
comforter.

When my late husband was alive he deposited the sum of$8.5 Million
witha Bank in Cote D lvoire. Presently this money is still in the custody
ofthe Bank in Cote D lvoire.

Recently, my Doctor told me that I would not last for the next Eight
monthsdue to cancer problem. Having known my condition I decided to
donate this fund to a church,organization or good person that will utilize
this moneythe way I am going to instruct herein.

I want a church,organization or good person that willuse this funds to
help the orphans, widows and other people that needfinancial
assistance. Using part of this money to provide facilities for God,s work, taking
the gospel to greater height is my major reason of donating this funds
out. The Bible made us to understand that"Blessed is the hand that
giveth". l took this decision because I don't have any child that will
inherit this money and my husband relatives are not Christians and it had
been their wish to see my husband dead in order that they might inherit
his wealth since we have no son. These people are therefore not worthy
of this inheritance.

This is why I am taking this decision. Meanwhile I am not afraid of
death hence I know where I am going. It is only a sinner who's death is
painful I don't need any telephone communication in this regard because
of my health hence the presence of my husband's relatives around me
always. I don't want them to know about this development and l know that
With God all things are possible.

As soon as I receive your reply I shall give you the contact of the
Bank in Cote d' lvoire. I will also issue a letter of authorization to the
bank that will prove you the present beneficiary of this money. I also
want you to always uplift me in prayer.

My happiness is that I lived a life of a worthy Christian. Whoever that
Wants to serve the Lord must serve him in truth andfaith, "serving him
with all you have, knowing that naked we come and naked we must go"
Contact me on the this email address and any delay in your reply will give
me room in sourcing another good person, church,organization for this
same purpose.

Please assure me that you will act accordingly as I Stated herein.

Hoping to receive your response immedaitely.

Thanks and Remain blessed in the Lord.

Your Sister in Christ.

Mrs.Alies Adams.

Email ; ( alies_adams@yahoo.fr )


Brief editorial comments: Sin kills. God heals.

Attn: Friend.

I am Dr. Harry Chisale, the director, Auditing and Accounting unit of
the
Continental Bank, and the account officer to Brochem Bereau, a multi
million
and multi dimensional Japanese Firm based here in Benin Republic, The
Director Eng. Chun, Myung-Sik, unfortunately died in the tragic plane
crash
of Union Transport Africaines Flight Boeing 727 in Cotonou, Benin
republic
on the December 25, 2003. You will read more stories about the crash on
visiting the below:

website: www.cnn.com/2003/WORLD/africa/12/26/benin.crash/

Before his death Eng. Chun, Myung-Sik has a ten (10) years time deposit
account with my bank made in June 1993, which has matured and several
official notice despatched to his confidential contact as instructed
without
response. No other person knows about this account or any thing
concerning
it except him, and my comprehensive investigation proved that his
supposed
next of kin died with him in the crash.

I decided to contact you to assist in repatriating the fund before it
get
confiscatedor declared unserviceable by the bank. I seek your consent
to
present you as the bona-fide next of kin to the deceased customer so
that
the proceeds of the account valued at US$5.6Million can be paid to you
immediately and then you and I will share the money. I have used my
official
capacity to perfect all the administrative logistic to back up the
claim
before contacting you.

All I require is a secured bank account outside Benin Republic and your
honest co-operation to enable us see this deal through. I guarantee
that
this will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect
you
from any breach of the law. All documents of transaction and data will
be
destroyed with Telex and Info Tech Unit (TITU) immediately we receive
this
money leaving no trace to any place. If this proposal is acceptable to
you,
kindly email your following
information to me immediately:

a. Complete names
b. Private telephone number
c. Private fax number
d. Private email

Sincerely,
Dr. Harry Chisale
00229-97876751

Brief editorial comments: Another doctor?

These are the e-mails that would qualify as "Nigerian E-mail scams" that I have received just in the last two weeks. There are some features of them that resemble a form letter, and so it is worthwhile to look at them in at least a little bit of detail to determine the nature of the scam and why these frauds keep on entering into my inbox, and yours, more than likely.

First comes some sort of introduction that tries to explain why someone I don't know would bother to send me a message. After all, these scammers (like most scammers) recongnize that there is an initial distrust when dealing with people one does not know. I tend to only distrust those selling me things, as I tend to have no problem with strangers in general. It is only those people who seek to gain at my loss that earn my annoyance, and there are rather too many of those people around. Usually there is some kind of comment to the effect that only a foreigner could deal with this because the law of such-and-such country prevents their own citizens from this rather lucrative and shady business.

Then there is some kind of sob story that shows someone's sickness (in one case) or death (the rest) and that attempts to pull at my heartstrings. It seriously annoys me when people try to take advantage of my generosity. I would rather people think I am cold and heartless and not generous at all, because then such generosity as I occasionally show would be a surprise, and would be welcomed, rather than expected and taken advantage of. Such is the life, though. Often times there is some kind of pathetic tone through the entire message that attempts to demonstrate how destitute said recipient would be without my participation in the rather shady dealings (this is probably true, as there are many destitute in Africa, though the ones who propogate such scams are probably those who are more clever and wicked among the rather poorly off population at large).

Also along with the appeal to my generous and merciful heart is the appeal to greed. Anyone who appeals to my greed is someone to be highly distrusted, just as is anyone who appeals to my generosity. There is usually some obscenely large amount of money that is supposedly waiting there for me, and all I have to do is give the local guy a cut and I get the rest. I have my sins, but rampant greed does not happen to be one of them. I know what they sell, and I'm not buying. I try never to let my greed get in the way of my sound and sceptical thinking.

There is also often some kind of appeal to credibility. Whether that is some sort of bogus title (those who scam others are always trying to give themselves titles in order to be seen with credibility they do not deserve), or some sort of "close relation" to the deceased, there is always some attempt to increase trust by the use of titles. I destest the use of titles in increasing credibility. It really does nothing for me. I do not view people selling me things as credible, and when they attempt to enlist credibility, I trust them even less (if that were possible). When it comes to human credibility, the smallest child of a migrant farming family (some of my few childhood friends) has as much credibility as the most powerful person or the most educated. At any rate, they are equally worth my attention and consideration. The credibility of something should be in the content of the appeal, for if that content is present, I care not what letters are behind your name, or if you have any at all. If the content is lacking, all of the titles in the world will not help you gain my trust.

Finally, these letters often have information in bold or in all caps because they assume I am stupid and cannot read for myself. I deteset when people use all caps or bold in order to emphasize more than one word in writing. I am literate, and I do pay attention (rather close attention, if sometimes hostile) to what I am reading. It is an insult to have phrases and sentances bolded, because if they are important to me, they will receive their proper notice when I am reading them. It is rather foolish to assume that what is important to you is going to be important to me, unless you actually know me (for I am an unusual person).

How then, does one sell to someone like myself? One doesn't. If I want something, all I need is the right opportunity at the right price (and I am always looking for opportunities), and I will have no problem with it. If I already want it, your selling is useless, because I am already a willing customer and you are wasting your energy by trying to sell me it. If I do not want it, all of your attempts to sell me your product will fall on deaf ears because the harder you try to sell it the more suspicious I will be about the product and about the motive of the person selling it to me. It is rather easy to irritate and annoy me (especially recently, because I do not have the reserves of patience I normally have to keep me from being set of by everything around me). It is, however, rather difficult to move me in a positive direction, unless you speak with reason. If you must appeal to me, appeal to my intellect and reason. Appeal to truth, to facts, to evidence. Do not appeal to your expertise, as you probably don't have any. And please, if you want to appeal to me, do not send me a mass e-mail. I'm worth more than that.